Caroline supposed she should be upset at the news, but she couldn’t work up the energy. The photos didn’t matter. In a few days, no one would be interested in the woman who almost married Josh McInnes. Whoever Josh chose next would get the attention. No doubt he’d learned his lesson and would go back to dating celebrities.
“Don’t worry,” Kirsty told her. “It will all be fine. The photos will be old news in a day or two. Some other celebrity will do something more interesting and the media will turn their attention to them. You only have to hold on until this passes.”
Caroline wanted to tell her friend that she honestly didn’t care about the photos. She wasn’t sure she cared about anything. Instead, she nodded her agreement and left it at that.
“Okay.” The police officer seemed to have given up waiting for a response from her. “I’ll be in touch.”
With that, he strode out of the house. Caroline was relieved to see him go. One less person to deal with. Unfortunately, he let someone in when he left. Mitch entered the living room with an apologetic look on his face.
“How are you doing?” His smile was gentle. With one look at Caroline’s red, swollen eyes, he nodded. “About how I expected.” He sighed. “I’m sorry to add to things for you, but Josh wants you to come to the castle tonight to sign some papers.”
Kirsty jumped to her feet. “Can’t that wait? Doesn’t he have a heart at all? Surely he realises Caroline isn’t up to this right now.”
“I’m sorry. I know the timing isn’t great. But I’m sure Caroline wants to resolve this as much as Josh. It won’t take long.” He turned to Caroline. “Can you be there at eight o’clock?”
“Can we make it another day?” Caroline knew she sounded pathetic.
“Sorry.” Mitch gave her an apologetic shrug. “He’s leaving the country tonight. So it has to be this evening.”
Caroline felt a sharp jab in her side. He was leaving already. She’d never see him again. She ignored the pain that twisted her insides, and told herself that this was a good thing.
“Fine. I’ll be there.”
“Thanks. That’s great.” He turned to Kirsty. “Can you walk me out? I’d like a word.”
Kirsty frowned, but followed Mitch. Caroline was glad that they were gone. She loved Kirsty, but she hoped her friend would follow Mitch out the door and come back in a year or two. She slid over to lie on the couch, curling her knees tight into her chest. Tomorrow, she promised herself, she would stop wallowing in self-pity and get on with her life. The centre needed her. She still had things to do. She would feel better staying busy. It was a good plan. That left her with today to mourn what might have been with Josh.
When Kirsty came back into the room, she had a strange look on her face. As though she was excited about something, but loath to show it.
“This won’t do.” Kirsty grabbed Caroline’s arm and yanked her into a seated position. “Enough of this. If you’re going to deal with Josh tonight, we need to get some work done. You can’t turn up in your PJs. We need to get you cleaned up and do something about those eyes. Do you have cucumber? Never mind. I’ll send one of the boys to fetch some. They’re just sitting out front playing dominoes anyway. Since the press left town there’s really no need for them to be there.” She tugged Caroline to her feet. “Shower,” she ordered. “I brought new lingerie to cheer you up. You can wear that, and that pretty lavender dress of yours. There’s no way I’m letting you go to the castle looking anything but stunning. One look at you and Josh will regret that he ever let you walk away.”
Caroline thought it would take more than an old dress and new underwear to make Josh regret anything. But Kirsty was right about one thing. There was no way she could confront Josh with red, swollen eyes, wearing pink pyjamas. As she dragged herself up the stairs to the shower, part of her wished she still had her grey suits. They were like armour. And armour sounded perfect for saying goodbye to the man she loved.
CHAPTER FORTY
Caroline arrived at the castle at exactly eight o’clock, flanked by Kirsty and Archie. Archie had demanded to attend, saying she needed all the moral support she could get. Caroline couldn’t say no. She was ill with the thought of facing Josh again. If there had been any way to avoid it, she would have. Instead she’d given herself a pep talk on the fact that being an adult meant facing difficult situations. She needed to be mature. She needed to be calm. She needed to hide in a closet until she was sure Josh was out of the country.
Caroline felt battered. Her insides were raw with the emotional beating she’d endured—most of it caused by her own stupidity. What made her think that she could marry Josh McInnes? She was silly idiot of a woman. At least she’d had the sense to realise in time that he would never love her. He’d obviously recognised that she was unlovable as soon as he’d set eyes on her. There was no other explanation as to why he’d picked her, out of the millions of women who would have jumped at the chance, to be his wife.
She placed a hand on her stomach and tried to calm the chaos inside her. It was humiliating to have to face the man again. For them to both be reminded of the reasons why their marriage plans had been such a joke. People like her didn’t marry people like Josh. It was one of the laws of the universe. She’d been stupid to challenge it. And as soon as she got this awful evening over with, she’d slink back to her place in the scheme of things and give up on her hopes of having a family. It wasn’t for her. She was sure of it.
Caroline’s head ached as Kirsty drove them to the castle in Lake’s car. She’d been worried that there were still some press lingering. There were none. Caroline and Josh were old news.
“It will be okay,” Kirsty said as she reached over to pat Caroline’s hand.
She didn’t have the heart to contradict her friend. It wouldn’t be okay. It would be torture. She would be ripped open after this visit. And she would spend days, months, years, putting herself back together.
The castle looked deserted, which was a relief to Caroline. When they got to the front door, they found a note pinned to it.
“It says we’re to go round the back. Josh is in the garden,” Archie told them, even though they could all read it for themselves.
Caroline licked her dry lips. “That’s a strange place to deal with paperwork.” Why couldn’t he just have been waiting for her in his office? She wanted to get this over with as fast as possible.
“He’s American.” Kirsty led Caroline to the back of the house. “Strange is a way of life for them.”
They walked around to the back of the house and Caroline was relieved to see that there was no trace of the marquee. Or the tartan sheep.
“You returned the sheep to their owner, didn’t you?”