And so, I sealed my fate and started writing.
I mean – Mr. Big Shot 69?
What kind of lame email address was that? What kind of lame man thought up an email like that? It was arrogant and crass.
I tried to keep up.
* * *
To: [email protected]
Reply-To: [email protected]
Re: Re: Emergency
* * *
Hey, big fella. Are you Mr. Big Shot with the emphasis on big? Or Mr. Big Shot with the emphasis on shot?
* * *
I know a lot of men named John, as you can imagine. Saturday is kinda short notice for a busy gal like me. I usually book two weeks in advance. Just so we’re on the same page, how about you confirm the conditions and rates? They may have changed.
* * *
Later, SexyLexi911
* * *
I should have immediately sent him an email that he had the wrong address and left it at that, but there was something about his message that had me intrigued.
"There," I said. "Sent."
“Oh, my God.” Candace and I stared at each other, huge grins on our faces. “Way to go!” She held up her hand for a high-five, and I dutifully responded, our palms slapping. “You did it!”
“I did, I did,” I said but I didn't feel triumphant. I felt this vague sense of Oh, my God what did I just do…
I knew the moment I sent my response that I’d made a mistake but I had no idea how to recall an email sent through Yahoo and so I took in a deep breath and waited to see how he’d respond.
I turned back to the screen, wondering if he’d reply. I bit my lip and watched my screen, thinking he’d most likely catch on and realize he was being played. I actually hoped he’d reply in all seriousness. It could turn out to be a good laugh.
After about five minutes, Candace and I returned reluctantly to our books. I figured he backed out of responding, maybe realizing his mistake. Then my computer chimed once more and sure enough, an email appeared in my mailbox.
* * *
To: [email protected]
Reply-To: [email protected]
Re: Re: Re: Emergency
* * *
Sorry about the short notice but I broke it off with my former girlfriend and I can’t go alone or there’ll be speculation about my ability to keep a woman interested in me. I realize that the very fact I'm contacting you suggests that's reality, but seriously, it isn’t. I want to rub you in someone’s face, so to speak. As to the terms, I understand that it’s $1000 for the evening and more if I want any dessert. To be negotiated. I will likely not be asking for anything besides the date.
* * *
Oh, and emphasis on big. *EG*