It choked me up, but I kicked myself mentally in the head for being such a romantic fool about Luke. Like Mrs. Marshall said, I wasn't part of his world and he wasn't part of mine. It was better that we ended it now. I couldn't imagine a life with Mrs. Marshall as my mother-in-law.
Having sex with Luke and doing the few things we did together had fooled my stupid mind into believing that he really felt those things and was right for me. I started to have real feelings for Luke, imagining us together. Happy.
I walked down the street, slipping my sunglasses on to hide my tears, and waited for the taxi to come and pick me up.
* * *
Later, on the way to the city, I got a text from Luke.
LUKE: Where are you? Did you leave?
That choked me up even more. Yeah, I left. When I saw the way he looked at Jenna, I realized that he hadn't gotten over her, despite all his protests. Then, Mrs. Marshall drove home just how different we were…
LUKE: Please answer me so I know you haven't been kidnapped or drowned when you snuck out to take a swim without me…
I wasn't going to answer. I didn't want him to apologize. I didn't want to read his lies about how he didn't feel anything for Jenna and that what I'd seen was a mistake.
There was no mistaking the way he looked at her and the way she looked at him.
I wasn't sure if he could forgive her, but I realized that me spending even more time with him, having sex with him again, might be fine for him, but it wasn't fine for me. I knew it would only end up hurting me.
We were from two different worlds.
I had to quit him and fast. Put him out of my mind.
I put my cell away and turned off the ringer, not wanting to hear in case he called.
Then I changed my mind.
I pulled out my cell and sent Luke a message that I hoped would end things between us for good.
ALEXA: I'm fine and no I didn't drown. Sorry about leaving without telling you, but I realized I can't keep up this façade of being your girlfriend. The sex was great, but I'm just not built to deal with casual hookups. It's not who I am. You're going to have to talk to people and tell them the way you really feel. You can't keep pretending, Luke. Be real with them and they'll finally realize you are your own man and have your own plans. Honesty is the best policy, or so they say…
Then I turned off my cell and turned off the ringer, not wanting to read his response.
* * *
I arrived back at the apartment and went upstairs, feeling like I had a huge weight on my shoulders. I had to buck up and be strong. It wasn't like Luke and I had any future, as Mrs. Marshall said. I knew that when I agreed to go with him to the beach house, but my silly romantic mind had let myself believe otherwise even if I was denying it.
Candace was sitting at her desk, one foot tucked under her, reading emails, when I walked into the room we used as an office.
"There you are – why are you home so soon? I thought you were going to stay for the entire weekend?"
I plopped my duffel bag down on the floor and slumped on my chair.
"The ex-fiancée showed up and I realized I was fooling myself if I thought he'd ever be interested in me for more than a stand-in fake girlfriend. Plus the mother pointed out that Luke and I are from two different classes and are not right for each other."
"What," she said and made an angry face. "That's bullshit. I'm sorry, kiddo. He's a real hunk of man, and this class shit is just that – crap. I saw him with you. He really likes you."
"He may, but you should have seen the way he looked at her."
"Aww, I'm sorry." She smiled and squeezed my arm. "But if he's really not into it, you should just put him out of your mind. Someone new and better will come along."
"I know, I know, but my stupid girl mind – the one who believed in princesses meeting handsome princes surfaced despite all my efforts to choke the living daylights out of her."
Candace laughed softly at that. "Yeah, I know. Too much Ariel and Anastasia in my past as well. We have to be realistic about guys. They're not Prince Charmings. They're guys from Seinfeld, like Georges and Newmans. Some look better than others, but they're all little boys underneath."
I nodded and took in a deep breath. "But man, he's as close as you can get to a Prince Charming, without the wanting to be married and have a real family part."