“What do you think of this one?” asked Judijean, fluffing the sleeves of a flowered, velvet and chiffon calf-length dress. “I wore it in my choir director’s wedding.”
“Velvet and chiffon. What season was that for?” asked Rachel.
“March, of course,” said Judijean.
“Have you ever seen the show?” asked Lauren.
“Of course, I’ve watched it with you,” said Judijean.
“Well, Judes, that dress is not remotely sexy,” said Lauren.
“Betsy said to bring nice, formal dresses,” said Judijean. “Which this is. Both. Nice and formal.”
“It’s cute,” I said. It was not cute. At all. “But,” I continued, “I don’t think it’s going to make Bellamy take notice.”
“Why don’t you take a look at the gowns I brought,” said Betsy’s friend Maggie, the dress thief. My ears perked up at the word ‘gowns.’
“Yes, let’s,” I said.
“This gown,” said Maggie, “would be perfect. Check out the sequins here, and the slit, and,” she spun it around, “look how low the back is.”
“I love it!” I said.
“Hang it over there with the other stuff that needs to be tried on,” Rachel said to Judijean, who unquestioningly did as she was told. We have a bad tendency of ganging up on Judijean sometimes when the five of us are together.
“This one would be pretty on you,” said Maggie, holding up a sparkly gold mini dress. It was covered in sequins and had an asymmetrical band of fringe on its hem.
“I think it’s a little… loud for me.”
“Definitely try it on,” said Betsy.
“It will fit right in on the show,” Rachel agreed, handing it to Judijean, who gophered it over to the other dresses and returned like a loyal dog. I’d never given this dynamic of our group much thought; it only happened when all five of us were together. In groups of two, three, or even four we typically treated her more like one of the gang. It got me thinking about the dynamics of living with all those girls. I had to come in strong and be an Alpha girl, or I was going to end up as the group’s Judijean. I knew from Christine’s slip-up on the phone that Shar had made it onto the show, and she clearly had a target on my back. As someone who is usually rather reserved, I could see myself being bullied and pushed around by a group of tacky, abrasive girls.
“Can I talk to you all about something?” I asked. I wished Maggie wasn’t there, since I barely knew her, but I didn’t have the luxury of rescheduling this talk.
“Sure,” said Lauren. “What’s up?”
“I’m a little nervous to be around all those girls. What if I can’t remember who’s who?”
“Who cares?” said Rachel. “You’re just there for Bellamy.”
“Okay,” I said. “Good point. But what if they push me around?”
“They won’t push you around! They’ll love you,” said Betsy.
“One of them already has it in for me. She seems to think I’m really plain and boring.”
“You wouldn’t have gotten on the show if the producers didn’t see something special in you,” said Rachel.
“The video diary I submitted of myself was a little wackadoo. I’m afraid I only got on because they think I’m more of a freak than I really am.”
“You’re overthinking this,” said Lauren. “Be yourself and it will work out fine.”
“I know that we just met,” said Maggie, “but I’d like to add something if you don’t mind.”
“I don’t mind at all,” I said, bracing myself. What had she already seen in me that needed to be corrected?
“Be yourself,” said Maggie, “but if that stops working for you, try being someone else. Find the person in the room who is least likely to get picked on, and act like they act.”