Bellamy's Redemption

“Here they come now,” said Alanna. She tried to hide her distaste over their outfits, but I saw her nose wrinkle a little at the site of them. Jessica had on cropped sweat pants, a half-shirt that said U.S.A. and red, white, and blue sparkly heels. Her left hand had red fingernails. Her right hand had blue. She was blowing on them; apparently they were still wet. Vanessa was wearing a palm tree print maxi dress with a scraggly shawl. Her hair was pulled back in a bun. Flip-flops were on her feet.

“I’m being ironic,” said Jessica.

Vanessa pressed a heating pad to her stomach, wincing. “I’m not, y’all. I’m dead serious. I have my period and I feel like hell. Pardon my Yankee-mouth. I’m totally bloated. I feel like Deb looks today. Somebody shoot me.”

“So I am fat,” said Deb.

“Thirty minutes ago you were in your bikini, looking skinny,” I said to Vanessa. “What happened?”

“It just hit me. Like a ton of bricks. Like a truck. Sweet Jesus, do we really have to do this? I’d like to sit this out.”

“Me too,” said Alanna. “I’m so jetlagged. Let’s stop filming today. Please.”

“I hate to say it,” said Catalina Cartwright, “but in all my years of hosting these shows, you are the sorriest looking bunch I’ve ever seen. We’re in Italy. They care about style over here. You ladies are not representing yourselves or the show very well.”

“Are you teasing us?” asked Deb, looking down at the overalls she’d just been bragging about.

“I’m perfectly serious,” said Catalina.

“We’ll be changing into those vintage evening gowns you told us about after our river cruise is over,” said Klassie. “Maybe you can focus on getting some good footage then.”

“It’s not some river cruise,” said Catalina. “It’s a voyage down the Grand Canal. Furthermore, on behalf of the entire Bellamy’s Redemption staff, we would all appreciate if you ladies would stop giving us editorial advice. We will host, film, and edit the show as we all see fit. Now, are any of you going to change into something else, or should we go?”

We stood around yawning and wishing we had phones to check, avoiding eye contact with her. I suppose we all thought she was talking about anyone but us.

“I’m going to stay in my overalls, if you don’t mind,” Deb finally said, very softly.

“Unreal!” Catalina exclaimed. She marched outside in a huff and we followed her since we guessed it was what we were supposed to do. “Stand here,” she said pointing at a big urn of greenery, “and try to look excited when Bellamy arrives.”

“I won’t have to try,” said Deb.

A moment later a gondola came into sight. Perched high in the middle of the back of it was Bellamy. He had a little hat upon his head and he was wearing a striped shirt. He waved nervously at us.

“Look at him,” said Deb. “Look at him on that long skinny boat. Is that Bellamy or some Italian guy? Oh, I can tell now. It’s Bellamy. Hi, Bellamy!” she yelled.

“Hi girls,” he said, drifting up to us. Some Italians and camera guys helped get the gondola near us, and helped each of us get in. Bellamy was covered in sweat. A real gondola driver took over and Bellamy settled in between Alanna and me. “I can’t believe I didn’t tip it over. I can barely swim,” he whispered to me, raising his eyebrows. I gave his arm a squeeze.

“Why are you whispering to her?” asked Alanna. “Maybe you’d rather if the rest of us weren’t even here? That’s how you’re making us feel. We’re all your guests.”

“Sorry, Alanna,” he said. Instantly a look overcame him like he’d been punched him in the gut. “It’s great to see all of you,” he added, pulling away from me.

The gondola was held in place while Catalina presented her little spiel from shore: “Bellamy, you looked like a real pro out there.” Her voice was crisp and flirtatious and her smile was radiant. She smirked cutely into the camera. “You’re giving these Italian stallions a run for their money! One of these lovely women, just six left, will be Bellamy’s fiancé soon! I’m not sure who it’s going to be, but I do know that she’s going to be one lucky lady! It’s all so exciting! I suppose I’d better let you go on your cruise of Venice’s famous Grand Canal now. Have fun!” She waved as we were let loose and we began to drift a little. Then she took a few steps up a little stone bridge and waved as we floating underneath it and emerged on the other side. She tossed some rose petals on our heads and laughed delightedly.

“Ugh,” said Alanna, brushing a petal from her hair.

“And they’re off! Off t

o find love!” Catalina exclaimed. She immediately slumped and applied a heavy coat of Chapstick once the cameras cut away from her.

“So here we are,” said Bellamy as we floated along.

“Here we are,” said Deb, nudging him with her toe.

“This afternoon is going to be really great,” said Bellamy. “We will take in the Venice scenery, and then we’re going to stop for a special lunch. There are just six of you left, and this is getting really serious. I’m going to make a point to spend some one-on-one time with each and every one of you today. This is your chance to show me you care, too.”

“What happened with Tamika? Why did you send her home?” asked Deb.

“Oh, um, I wasn’t sure if we had a connection…” Bellamy scratched his neck, looking uncomfortable about being put on the spot.