“I want to go upstairs,” she whispered.
His hand tightened on hers. “Rusty?”
“I want to spend the night forgetting. With you. I want you. Tonight.” She looked away. “I don’t know about tomorrow, Keir, and I know I’m being selfish asking for this.” She gave a dry chuckle. “I’ve been thinking about myself for so long that it’s hard to stop doing it, but I’m trying.”
Keir reached out and removed the mug from her hand. “It isn’t selfish if I want it too.”
Her heart stopped in her chest.
“Come on,” he said.
He tugged her hand, and she let him pull her off the stool. Then, in silence, she followed him upstairs to his bedroom.
Chapter 21
Keir wasn’t sure what was going on. Mairi wasn’t herself: she was confused and hurting. Her whole world had turned upside down, and she didn’t know how to fix it. He understood what she meant about using him, but he didn’t feel the same way about things. If he could give her a few hours of pleasure, of respite from the thoughts driving her nuts, then he was more than happy to do so. Even more than that, he wanted to be with Mairi. He wanted to show her, through every touch, how much she meant to him and how desperately he wanted to be with her.
He wasn’t an idiot. Their relationship, if you could even call it that, was balanced on the edge of a knife. One false move and they’d both be bleeding. Even knowing that, he couldn’t stop the hope rising inside him, because Mairi was here, in his house, soon to be in his bed. After years of dismissing him, she was touching him, talking to him, leaning on him. It was more than he’d ever hoped to achieve in such a short period, and nothing would stop him from showing her how much he loved her. That he’d never stopped loving her. That he would always love her. He was born to love Mairi, and everything within him ached when she wouldn’t let him.
He pushed his bedroom door open, realizing his bed wasn’t made and that Mairi wouldn’t even notice, which made him smile.
“More gray and black, Keir? Really?”
He smiled at her. “Tell you what. You marry me. and you can flood the house with color.”
“Funny,” she said, but before she looked away, he saw only pain in her eyes.
“Hey. I was joking.”
“I know.” Her eyes were shuttered now, and he couldn’t read them. “Do you know what’s really funny?”
“Tell me,” he said, hoping she didn’t mean that ironically, because if she told him something sad and burst into tears, he didn’t know what he would do.
This time when she looked up at him, her smile was genuine. “I’m wearing this stupid cat suit, and I don’t think I can get out of it. I had to use half a bottle of baby oil to get into it.”
His heart stuttered, and his cock woke up from its slumber. “Putting aside the thought of you and a bottle of baby oil, why did you put the damn thing on?” It still rankled that she was wearing a sexy outfit some other guy had sent her.
“I put it on to wind you up.” Her grin was pure mischief. “It worked.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Then you won’t care if the suit doesn’t survive me taking it off.”
“You wouldn’t.” She took a step back.
“Oh, yes, I definitely would.” He lunged for her, but she squealed and ran, scrambling over the bed to the other side.
“Come on,” she said, “even the bedding is gray.”
He threw himself over the bed at her, but she laughed and ran, letting him land with a thump on the floor. She was heading for the door, but Keir was faster; he snagged her ankle, making her fall in front of him.
“That’s cheating,” she said.
“I didn’t know there were rules.” He held her tight as he crawled over her to straddle her hips.
“Now, Keir. This was a gift. You need to be reasonable. It isn’t polite to ruin other people’s gifts.” There was no sadness in her eyes now. They sparkled with mischief. The wild woman he knew and loved was well and truly back, and he was going to make sure she stayed for good.
He grabbed the neckline of the suit and pulled. Nothing happened. He’d expected it to rip, but all it did was stretch.
“What the hell?”