His jaw clenched, tight. His eyes blazed. “You nearly cost me my sister.”
Another slash. Another wound. She wasn’t sure how she managed to stay on her feet.
“I know.”
There was nothing else to say. No apology great enough. She’d chanced a woman’s life because she’d thought she knew better than everyone around her. And although she’d convinced herself that she acted to protect Claire, she’d also done it to pander to her own ego. She was beginning to see that the damage she caused by acting then thinking, was long lasting. There were always consequences—for her and for the people she dragged into her plans.
“You took risks with Katrina’s life to protect Claire.” Another accusation.
That one bristled. She met him eye to eye. “You did the same.”
He shook his head. “No. We always intended to protect Claire. The only thing that changed was the timeline.”
That reasoning would never be good enough for Megan. “She’s my twin.”
He moved closer, the length of his body pressing against hers. There was no personal space from this man—he wouldn’t allow it. “It doesn’t excuse what you did. You put yourself in danger. You took risks you’re not equipped to deal with. You took your phone into a dangerous situation and gave a sociopath the ability to track you. You relied on luck and charm to get you out of there alive. You were unprofessional. Nothing you did was smart or sane.”
He was breathing hard when he finished. Megan couldn’t say anything. He was right. They were all right. She’d gone in armed with bravado. The fact she’d gotten out again was pure luck.
“You put yourself in danger.” His words were barely a growl. “You went in there without backup.”
Unable to look at him, she turned her face. Her hands fell limply at her side.
“That is not acceptable.” Dimitri rumbled the words against her throat.
It was unacceptable because she was an amateur. Because she was untrained. Unskilled. Inexperienced. Because she’d been playing at
being a mercenary, while the people who actually knew what they were doing were left in the dark. There was nothing she could say to change things. She deserved every angry word fired at her.
“Do you have any idea how crazy I was, knowing I couldn’t watch your back? Knowing if something happened I wouldn’t be able to get to you in time? You left me helpless.” He hissed the word. It was the final insult to him, the fact she’d taken away his ability to protect.
Megan blinked back tears that threatened. It hurt to swallow. Her throat was tight with words she couldn’t say. Words she had no right to say. What was the point of an apology now? Empty words, offered too late.
“It was the longest twenty minutes of my life,” Dimitri said on a growl. “Waiting for you to come out of there. I felt every second. You can’t be in danger. It drives me insane when I know you’re in danger.” Dimitri’s nose rubbed up her throat. He nipped her earlobe. A chastisement that had her jerking within the cage he’d made of his body. “It can’t happen again. I won’t allow it.” His forehead fell to her shoulder. “Megan.” There was agony in the word. “How could you make me choose like that?”
Megan stilled. “Choose?”
“You or my sister,” he whispered. “Save you and ruin the chance to get at Rudi’s records. Or let you get hurt in the hope I’d get another chance at the records down the line.” His eyes closed slowly. Megan stopped breathing. Slowly, his eyelids fluttered open. The black depths of his eyes held emotion she was terrified to name. “You made me choose. Don’t ever do that again.”
“You didn’t have to choose,” Megan whispered, her heart beating so loudly she almost couldn’t hear her own words. “I made it out. I got the information. We’re both going to be fine.”
He shook his head slowly. “No. I had to choose. I had to be prepared. I had to know what I would do if you didn’t come out on time, if something went wrong. I had to know.”
She couldn’t ask. She didn’t want to know what his choice had been. The fact he’d had to make one was enough. Pain enough. Promise enough. She felt her bruised heart crack open and she felt Dimitri slip inside.
He bit her bottom lip. Hard. It wasn’t the teasing caress of a lover, it was the reprimand of a man on the edge.
“Never.” His words came out as a breath. “Never again.”
Unable to take her eyes from his, Megan reached up with a shaking hand and cupped the back of his neck. She tugged him to her, closing the scant distance between them. And then she poured her promise into a kiss.
Chapter Twenty-Five
The beast inside Dimitri, the one that had been barely leashed since Megan walked into Rudi’s house alone, broke free. She’d taken his control from him when she’d removed him from the operation. Now he wanted it back. But only she could give it to him. Only she could ease the fear that had been riding him, hot like rage, since she’d walked away from him and straight into danger.
Her nails scraped his scalp as she threaded both hands through his hair and tightened her hold. Flattening one palm to her nape and the other low on her back, he pressed her against him. She burned with the heat of her intensity. That fearlessness of hers, which was dangerous when she was in the field, made her unrestrained in her passion. Their kiss was a tussle of wills. A fight for dominance. A battle of untempered need fought out in clashing teeth and tongues.
He needed to feel her skin against his. He needed her naked. He needed it now.