Windmera-Desperation

Thus, she was not prepared for Mr. Chale’s visit. She had him taken to the morning room where she first offered him refreshment.

He declined, and as she took a seat and bade him sit as well, he declined again.

Chale was an elderly man, an experienced solicitor who had served Godwin’s father, and she had noted in the past, he had been pleased to serve the son just as faithfully. He looked uncomfortable and her stomach churned.

She knew why he had come. He fidgeted and stuttered, and it became obvious to Sara that he had come to discharge an uncomfortable duty. She was immediately set on edge and ready for a fight.

As he played with the fobs at his waistcoat, and hemmed and hawed over the words he was about to speak, she became impatient and snapped, “Out with it, sir, please.”

“His lordship has confessed his situation to me,” he finally said on a hushed note. “Thus, I am here to advise you that…he is very willing to do what he must for his freedom. I am here to try and make you understand that he has everything in order and ready to implement should you not sign the papers in question.”

Sara sat back and closed her eyes. When she opened them, her gaze fixed on nothing in particular and her voice was barely audible when she spoke. “He is determined in this dreadful course?”

“I am sorry to say he is, my lady. Though it grieves me to say it, his lordship will stop at nothing to obtain what he calls his freedom,” the solicitor said as dark patches filled his cheeks. He proceeded to point out the lifestyle and allowance his lordship was willing to give her in London if she would only sign the papers.

“Kindly advise Lord Ravensbury that I shall have to…study the situation before I give him my answer,” she said as her mind raced to find a way to save herself.

“Very well, but, again, I am sorry to inform you that his lordship is anxious and will not wait long for your reply. If he does not have it soon, he will ask me to go ahead, and…well, as I said, though I find this matter distasteful, under the circumstances…I must say it is his right, and he has already prepared his friends in Parliament, who have indicated with or without your signature he can proceed.”

“Mr. Chale!” Sara objected in outraged terms as her chin went up. “If my husband wishes to settle the matter of our marriage ending amicably, he must understand that I need time to adjust to his proposals. It is…for me, an unbearable shame. I ask only for one week. Surely a week is hardly unreasonable?”

“No, no, of course…quite reasonable,” blustered the elderly man. He stopped his pacing and added, “I will see to it that his lordship will be patient about this and give you the week to decide what course of action you wish to follow. But I do caution you that there are only two choices you have, an annulment or a divorce.”

Sara was in a rage. How dare this little man speak to her this way! How dare Godwin do this to her! Well, she would not demean herself. She stood and inclined her head as a dismissal.

The elderly man made his way out, and her face was austere as she watched him take his leave.

When he closed the door at his back, she sank back onto her lovely yellow damask sofa and put her hands to her face.

She would have to leave Ravensbury…leave what she had for years thought of as her home. She would have to live with the fact that another woman would occupy it? No. She could not allow this to happen. Yes, she had always dreamt of being a London hostess, but one with a title and position. This divorce or annulment would only leave her with money—no status!

For no reason at all, her mind flew to Lisa’s ball all those years ago. Oscar and Lisa would gloat and think she had only gotten what she deserved. In the end, Lisa had realized what Sara had done and had cut their connection. Why Lisa should have done that, she couldn’t understand, after all, Lisa went on to marry Oscar, and by all accounts, the two went on very happily. In fact, they owed their happiness to her!

She had to find a way out of this and because she was desperate, and because it was in her character, she found what for her was a suitable answer.

Her eyes narrowed and took on luster, the gleam of a youth’s excitement when faced with an adventure. Her eyes darkened as she formulated her plan, and her lips took on a twist as she entered the worst of her dark nature.

* * * * *

Sara didn’t waste any time as she attended to the intricacies of her plan. She knew a great deal of its success depended on her handling matters herself.

She smiled. It was early yet, and she had just enough time. Ha! Godwin was a fool to think he could do this to her. Did he think she would quietly go off to London and give up what was hers? She was neither soft nor beaten, as the years had left their mark on her. She had learned to find Godwin’s reluctant forgiveness a bitter draft to swallow. Indeed, a part of her despised him for it. She had made a fool of him. She had turned him away from Lisa without his being aware who held those strings. He was a fool then…he was a fool still.

So, he meant to challenge her, did he? Very well, she would make him rue the day for his decision. The first thing she would have to do is turn to Mrs. Abernathy, the village gossip.

Once again, Sara remembered Lisa and Oscar, who had turned to one another at the end of Sara’s ministrations all those years ago. The two married and their marriage, or so everyone was fond of telling her at the routs and country dinners, was quite a success.

She hadn’t seen either of them except in passing since that fateful night of the ball. What would they say if they knew Godwin was divorcing her…or worse, annulling their marriage?

With a sure determination in her heart, she made up her mind, crossed the oak flooring to a large well-worn Gothic table of monumental proportions and took up its matching chair.

She dipped the quill in the ink well. What she needed first was Mrs. Abernathy. Indeed, she thought of the odd woman as a gross little skirter forever on the fringes, hoping to be accepted by the gentry. She would do to carry out one of her errands.

The first and most important step of Sara’s plan, she believed, could only be handled by herself. No other in her household could be trusted—they all loved Godwin too much.

~ Five ~

DAYS AFTER SARA AND GODWIN’S ugly encounter over the divorce, Godwin was called away on estate business.