Second First Impressions

I’ve got to heed the warning about being dazzled, but it’s too late. He bends and puts his shoulder into my stomach, there’s an upward push, an arm around my knees and I’m facedown, a long way off the floor, looking down at his butt. I repeat: dazzled.

My foot knocks over a cup of pens. Melanie is screaming with joy.

“No, no,” I beg, but now I’m looking at the carpet, the in-tray on Melanie’s desk, TJ’s astonished blink, the potted plant near the door. “My bag. My jacket.”

I’m hoisted, which feels like a bob and a bounce. Melanie brings both things to Teddy, hooking them onto his free arm. I say into his back, “I’ve got to start work for PDC.”

“When’s it due?” he asks Melanie.

“Her assistant emailed me already. We have time. One long lunch won’t ruin anything. We also had an accounts receivable meeting locked in, but I think we can reschedule that. In fact, I won’t expect her back this afternoon.”

I argue, “I’ll definitely be back.”

Upside-down, she says to me, “I know you’re planning on working all weekend. I’ll come in tomorrow and do a half day with you, so you won’t have to be alone.” Her hand combs through my hair. “Have fun.”

Melanie’s Saturdays are sacred. She sleeps in until two P.M.

“Oh, Mel, you don’t have to.” I’m having difficulty having a work conversation while folded over a man’s shoulder. In an even, normal voice I try to handle this situation. “Very good, Teddy, you’ve made us laugh, now put me down.”

“I don’t hear you laughing.” His arm squeezes my legs.

Melanie says, “Turn her more this way so I get her face in the shot.”

I screech like a pterodactyl. “You’re both dead. Do you hear me? Dead.” I try to grab at the doorframe when we pass it, but no luck. All I can think of is: What would Rose Prescott say if she could see me now?

Teddy says, “See ya, Mel. You’re on your own this afternoon. I’m keeping her.” Off we go, down the path. The pavers scroll underneath me. “Look after my boy,” he calls back at her. “He’s gluten intolerant.”

I bellow, “There’s an instruction sheet in the black binder I made for you with the lockup procedures. Set the alarm. Lock the door. Text me when you lock the door.”

“What? I can’t hear you.”

“Lock the—”

She bawls back, “I’ll waste company time and work on the Sasaki Method. Don’t do anything too naughty. See you tomorrow, not too early.”

Life is now this hypnotic swing and the sound of his footsteps. I’m possibly lying in the coma ward at the hospital having the best dream of my life. This ass. How is he carrying me so easily? How do I fit onto one of his shoulders? “Please don’t drop me,” I clutch at the waistband of his pants when he steps around a tortoise.

“Don’t grip too tight, you might tear them off. Relax, I’m not gonna drop you. I got her,” he yells down the path. “Look at me, Caveman Teddy. So . . . Rose has been giving you a hard time. I’m sorry.” He apologizes very earnestly. “She’s fairly terrifying.”

“You haven’t met Sylvia.” I don’t know their family situation, but I am guessing Rose and Teddy are children from different marriages.

The coldness in her tone when she spoke about Teddy was incomprehensible. He’s so . . . warm. Figuratively and literally. When he pauses to bob and bounce me up again, my hands slide. I’m technically just holding on. This hill is going to end and I shudder in sorrow.

“Like a sack of taters.” Renata is upside down when Teddy pulls to a halt. I resent her, this flat ground, the nearby car.

“I always thought girls liked being swept off their feet,” Teddy replies to her as he lowers me down. “But this one doesn’t.”

“Oh, they like it, all right,” Renata says knowingly. “Look at those pink cheeks.”

“Sorry about these two,” Aggie says to me, dignified as always. “I really do think they’re a bad influence on each other. Shall we go to lunch? We need to stop along the way to service my addiction.” I think she means she needs to check her lottery tickets.

“Ladies,” Teddy says, the sun glinting off his “Hot Stuff” badge. “Allow me.” He runs to each back door, helping the old ladies in. My door is opened too. “Hey,” he says near my ear before I get in. “You smell so nice. Must be from all that marinating in the bathtub.”

I drop so heavily into my seat that the entire car bounces. The feel of his shoulder is still pressed into my stomach.

“I think that was fun,” Aggie translates. I glance back to her; she’s holding hands with her sister, how adorable. I’m relieved to see her looking quite bright and awake.

“How have your hands been?” I ask her. She shrugs, like, what can you do? In response, Renata picks up the one she’s holding and begins to rub it tenderly.