Unsuitable

Audrey lifted her face to look in his eyes. “You didn’t take much convincing.”

“I am seldom wrong.” The rest was implication.

She put her hand in his. This morning he’d openly described himself as Mia’s father in front of Reece and Cameron. “We have a deal.” She didn’t think for a second he wanted to insert himself full-time in their lives, but she’d also never contemplated dying and leaving Mia alone either. “What are you thinking?”

“No touch parenting is what we agreed, but how would you feel about upping that to low touch? I wouldn’t interfere, I’m not moving back here, but Mia is part Barrett Baker-Brennan and I find that is more important to me now.”

“I freaked you out by nearly dying, didn’t I?”

He squeezed her hand. “And then some. I can’t treat that little bundle of bad smells and foul humour as a loose end anymore though. I can’t treat you that way either.” He smacked his head on the lounge back and blinked at the ceiling. “I’m going decidedly soft in my old age.”

“We have to talk about Mia’s guardianship. You know I’m good for financial support, but raising a child, you’d be an imbecile to pick me. I’ve always liked Merrill and Joe, if they agree to formalise the arrangement you already have, that would be fine by me. As long as it’s not your parents in the mix and we make that clear in a legal sense.”

The last tension in her body from the work week, from Mia’s tantrum, from missing Reece and being unsure about Barrett’s intensions, dissolved like sugar in hot water. “I agree. We’ll talk to them while you’re here.”

Barrett’s fingers played up and down her arm. “When Mia’s older I’ll be the one for field trips and extravagant useless gifts. And she’ll prefer me to you, which will annoy you no end. But I don’t know how to make her into a good person and you do. So our original deal stands, with two amendments: I want a low touch, remote care, as guided by you, relationship with my daughter, and I will make funds available for her welfare. She gets the best we can provide. Can you live with that?”

She nodded. She’d ask Les to write them an agreement to sign so it was official. “Now,” he released the hand she held. “This morning, that was a prime time episode of Dysfunctional Families part one. Is there going to be a part two? Will Reece be back?”

“No.” Her body might be melted but her voice was strong. “He walked away because I told him too.”

Barrett grunted. “How very obedient for a violent thug.”

“He’s not a violent thug.” That was the first time she’d said that aloud. She could at least be honest with herself. Les was right. There had been more threat in her father every day of her childhood than Reece had ever shown, and more care of her welfare.

“I know he’s not. He’s charming. I quite fancy him myself.” Barrett joggled her. “What are you doing sending him away?”

“He wants a family and I have mine. I don’t want another baby. I want my independence and control.” And that was the unvarnished, greedy, heartless truth.

“Oh, that is a relief.” Barrett slapped his hand on his thigh. “I always wondered if you’d want another one and there was no way I’d be able to refuse you. Especially seeing how incredible tantrum central is when she’s not possessed.” He joggled her again as if that would coach an answer out of her. “Why don’t you want another one?”

She didn’t need subterfuge or encouragement with Barrett. “I’m sometimes consumed by the idea that having a child alone and not being the main carer is the height of selfishness. I don’t regret it for a second, but it doesn’t feel right to do it again.”

“You do know that’s the very essence of parenthood in any society with an aristocracy. Get someone else to do the hard yards, including the child raising, ether paid or slave. This raise them yourself concept is a peasant thing and relatively modern for anyone with money.”

She laughed. “History aside, Barrett.”

“You’re doing fine as a parent. Mia is healthy and happy and bright as a thunderstorm. What more do you want? That little whirlwind in there could do with siblings. I had them. Ghastly. None of us got on. But I suppose they taught me something. But you didn’t, so I get it, and I am relieved, but if you change your mind and you want a matching set of kidlets, I’m there for you with the same conditions.”

Audrey snuggled into Barrett’s side. He’d been somewhere smoky. She could smell nutmeg, cinnamon and wood. A cigar. “I do love you.”

“Shame we didn’t fancy each other, but then you wanted the stable family thing and I like my riotous, promiscuous bachelor life.” He looked down at her. “Where was I? You look done in, Aud. I think you went back to work too early. You have visibly faded as the week went on.”

“First week back I knew it would be hard going. I need to stop thinking about Reece. It’s making me nauseous. I have some amazing new projects, I’m going to enjoy them, and once I get my head into work everything will be fine again.”

Barrett squeezed her into his side. “Terrible shame I didn’t fancy you.”

Now that his intentions about Mia were clear she couldn’t help but tease him. “I think you did fancy me.”

He lifted his hand and made a space between his first finger and thumb. “I think Reece fancies you to the very outer reaches of his soul, and I’m worried you’d reject that for yourself, and for Mia.”

He could be absent from her life for long stretches but Barrett knew her well enough to accurately trace the rumination of her heart. “You know I fancied you too.”

“Of course I do. But when I put you to bed, and leave you there alone, don’t take it the wrong way. Jeremy called.”

Audrey pulled away so she could see Barrett’s face clearly. He gave her the same smile Mia did when she was pleased with herself. “Well?”

“He grovelled.”