The Love Experiment (Stubborn Hearts 1)
Page 82
“Altogether?” she said. It was going to make a cute story. She’d done her part and even had a staff photographer take candid workplace pics of them that weren’t as revealing as the ones Barney had taken. Dropping it altogether was a waste, marketing would be pissed off. But the only story Jack cared about was Keepsafe, so dropping it was for the best.
“For future reference that’s what drop it means, Honeywell. Dogs get it, shouldn’t be hard for you.”
Oh. She tucked her head down, to hide how insulted and embarrassed that made her feel.
Jack stood, but it was Spinoza who said, “Enough, Madden. What’s biting your hairy ass?”
Phil b
lew out a stream of angry air. “I don’t know if you people get it, but keeping this paper in print is like pushing shit uphill. The runoff is filthy and smells of failure and it doesn’t wash out. Every time we miss a major story or overspend or screw up, it’s another reason for advertisers to desert and our owner to fold the whole thing into an online edition, and you know what that means—less of fucking everything and everyone.”
“We get it. No reason to be such a bastard,” said Jack.
Phil stood, turning to Jack. “Are you saying Honeywell shouldn’t be in this room? Can’t take the heat?” She held her breath because shouting at them to stop was a bad idea, and if Jack came out in her defense it would only demonstrate she’d needed it.
“I’m saying it’s not helpful if you’re going to abuse us.”
She let the breath go and hoped everyone was too focused on Phil to notice.
“You think I’m going to keep our jobs alive being a nice guy? Fuck off, Haley.” Phil went for the door. “Any of you can’t take the rough with the smooth, do us all a favor like Shona did and take a hike.”
There was silence when Phil left, until Jack, who’d managed to defend her without calling attention to their relationship and without decking Phil, said, “Cliché count?”
“Five,” she said when she realized no one else was going to answer. “Can’t take the heat. Pushing shit uphill. Do us all a favor. Rough with the smooth and take a hike.”
“Six,” Jack said. She’d missed one. What was it?
Spinoza laughed. “Hairy ass?” There was a general chuckle at that and chairs got pushed back as people moved about.
“It’s a more accurate description than nice guy,” said Jack.
And that was enough to sustain her through the rest of the day, a dental appointment, working back and missing yoga, but by the time Jack got home she’d lost the ability to keep it together. He only just got through the door and she was in his arms, gulping in the cinnamon clove scent of him, holding back sobs, holding on to the solidity of him when everything else felt slippery. She could so easily lose this job, lose her way in the city, lose her place in Jack’s life.
He squeezed her tight. “The day was made of stone, huh.”
It was made of shards so sharp and lumps so heavy, she was struggling to see a clear path forward. “I screwed up.”
“Yeah, you did.”
Oh God, even Jack thought she was a giant, pulsing, in-over-her-head cliché. She shifted to pull away but he locked her against him.
“And it’ll happen again. It’s the business. You have to be ready for the hit, know how to roll with it and recover quickly.”
“What if I can’t learn how to do that?”
“Why would you say that?”
Because right now it felt like too much and just when she was feeling more at home in the city.
She didn’t get a chance to respond. Jack backed her to the couch and sat her down, going to one knee in front of her. “You know why I didn’t take Madden’s head off today? It’s not because I’ve learned patience, it’s because you truly didn’t need me to.”
“But I couldn’t get a sentence out. I was a stammering mess.” And even if she had managed to talk like a normal person, she didn’t have anything to say that Phil wanted to hear. She’d failed to get the story of the day and to have the love experiment ready to run.
Jack cupped her cheek. “He was talking at you, not to you. It wouldn’t have mattered what you said, he’d already lost his temper. He’s done it to all of us. It’s not personal. Next time he does it and you don’t have the answers he wants, don’t let it fluster you, wait it out.”
“How many screwups do I get before he wants me out? There were more qualified people than me.”
“Madden didn’t offer you the job out of charity.” He sat beside her and took her hands in his. “Quit hijacking yourself.”