Kissing Her

“Those two were jealous cunts and your father knew someone would come knocking at the door for you. He was holding out for someone who could pay.”

“No.” I shake my head. My dad always doted on my sister, and if he thought I was his big payday, wouldn’t he have been nicer to me? Ragnar must read my mind because he answers my unspoken question.

“He treated you as less so that you thought you were. That way he could control you. He saw how Melina was and he knew that he wouldn’t make the same mistake again. Not with something so rare and special.” I don’t care if he’s right or not. They don’t control how I feel anymore and Ragnar believes I’m rare and special. That’s worth everything to me.

“It doesn’t matter now because you’re all mine.” He leans down and kisses my forehead. “And now you’re going to be my wife.”

Epilogue

Bee

Months later

I can’t believe this is my life. It’s too perfect to be real, but it is. I stand on the giant balcony overlooking Rome. We’ve been all over Europe these past two months and this is our last stop .We’ll be leaving soon. My husband has only been gone a little over an hour and I miss him already. With us spending every second together, one would think I’d want some alone time. Nothing could be further from the truth. I enjoy my time with him and I didn’t know how alone I felt until he was there filling up the empty space. I feel whole now and the world looks so different when I know I have someone I can lean on. We both feel that way and will always be together. I know neither of us could make it without the other.

I guess I’m not entirely alone while I wait for him to get back. I rub the bump that has popped up on me out of nowhere. I kept wondering when I would start to show and I swear I woke up one morning and there it was. Now, neither I nor Ragnar can keep our hands from it. He’s going to make a wonderful dad. I can see it in the way he is with me.

I’d started to get worried we wouldn’t get pregnant. We made love multiple times a day, but it ended up taking a few months before I finally got pregnant. It was probably for the best because we got to enjoy our time together. Plus, Ragnar had things he had to handle. I still don’t know much about what he used to do for a living, but I don’t care. All that matters to me is that it won’t touch our lives. He told me it never would and now he’s retired. I trust him and I know he would never let anything bad touch me or our children.

I always laugh when he says he’s retired. I tease him that he’s too young to be retired, but I’m not complaining about it. I’m enjoying every second of his retirement because he’ll help when our little ones come.

I don’t know much about babies and we’re not just having one. Ragnar made sure he got me pregnant with twins and I guess it was go big or go home. He never did anything thing small. He’s an all-or-nothing kind of man.

I know he has dark parts of his life and a darkness will always linger inside of him. Sometimes I’ll get a glimpse of it when we are in the midst of making love like crazy or when his control snaps. I’ll see flashes in his eyes. I enjoy that side of him because with me his darkness is need. He’s admitted that I’m an addiction that he can’t quit. I know that shouldn’t make me happy, but it does. To be needed so badly by him is my own kind of addiction.

He grew up alone and I’m his family now. We both have latched to each other since I don’t talk to mine anymore. That’s a part of my life I left behind just like he left a part of his behind, too. This is us making our own new life together.

I turn from the beautiful view and go back into our hotel suite. I don’t know how he did it, but Ragnar had our whole suite decorated for Christmas. This is the first Christmas I can remember being excited for, and I know the reason he went out tonight was probably to pick something up for me.

We celebrate Christmas here tomorrow and then head home and start the new year there. Plus, we both wanted to be back home when I started to get bigger. The further along I get, the more doctor appointments I’m going to need to go to, so it’s better to get settled in now.