He let out an incredulous laugh, unable to believe she’d even ponder such a scenario after every intimate thing they’d just done together. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?”
She shrugged, causing her breasts to shift and jiggle a bit beneath the sheet she’d pulled up to her chest. “I’m just not sure you wanted the company all night long.”
He slid onto the bed and beneath the covers, pulling her close to his side. “You’re sleeping in here with me,” he said, his adamant tone leaving no room for an argument. “I’m not even close to being done with you.”
“I’m okay with that,” she said, and he saw the relief in her eyes as she cuddled up next to him into the crook of his arm. She gave him a wry smile as her fingers skimmed along his bare stomach. “At least we don’t have to worry about getting caught in bed together this time.”
He knew her reference to the past was meant to be playful and prompt him to laugh, but instead it made him remember everything that had happened that day, including him walking away from Rae and breaking her heart. He didn’t want them to go their separate ways this time without her knowing the truth. And also, he owed her a huge apology for the way he’d hurt her, even if he’d truly believed it was for the best when it happened.
He glanced toward Raevynn, and with her looking up at him from where she was resting her head on his shoulder, he met her gaze. “Rae . . . I’m really sorry how everything played out that day,” he said, his voice a bit rough around the edges as he remembered the awful situation. “There’s things that you don’t know, that I should have told you but didn’t because I wanted to make things easy on you.”
Her brows furrowed into a frown. “What things?” she asked with quiet curiosity.
He exhaled a deep breath and threaded his fingers through her loose hair, his mind going back to that fateful day and how he and Raevynn believed they’d had an entire Saturday afternoon alone and had spent it in her bed—at first making out, then going all the way. Afterward, the two of them had fallen asleep, until her mother came into Rae’s room and found them naked and cuddled beneath the blankets together. With their clothes strewn on the floor, it wasn’t difficult to guess what had happened, and Joyce had lost her shit, yelling hysterically at Collin to get dressed and get out of the house.
Out of pure panic and shock, and not thinking straight, he’d thrown on his jeans and shirt and left, instantly regretting leaving Raevynn behind to deal with her furious mother. But Collin had been barely eighteen, and his parents had raised him to always respect adults and he’d acted on that inclination. Even though he’d hated the thought of Raevynn taking the brunt of Joyce’s anger alone, he knew it would only make the situation worse if he stayed.
As soon as he’d gotten home, the first thing he did was send Raevynn a text. I’m so sorry. Things will calm down and we’ll figure this out. I love you.
When he didn’t hear back from Raevynn that evening, he knew her mother had confiscated her phone. The following morning, when a call came through with Raevynn’s name on the display, he’d quickly answered, only to have Joyce demand that he come over so that the two of them could talk. And so, he had, with the intention of fighting for a relationship with Raevynn.
“Collin . . . what things?” she asked again, pulling him from the past and back into the present.
He cleared his throat and spoke. “So . . . yeah . . . the morning after your mother caught us together, she called and asked me to come over. When I arrived, you were up in your room and Joyce sat me down at the dining table and proceeded to tell me what, exactly, was going to happen between the two of us. With you leaving for Los Angeles to compete on Encore in a few weeks, she strongly advised me to break up with you immediately and cut all contact. I refused and tried to argue that I didn’t want to stop seeing you or talking to you, and that’s when she blackmailed me.”
“What?” Raevynn’s eyes rounded with shock, making it clear she had no clue the lengths her mother had gone to to keep them separated. “How?”
His lips flattened into a grim line. “Considering I was eighteen, and you were seventeen, she threatened to have me arrested for statutory rape if I didn’t completely end things with you, and that was a situation I knew I couldn’t win.”
She gasped, and then a painful sound escaped her lips. “Collin . . . I had no idea. Why didn’t you tell me?”
He turned toward her so that they were face-to-face and he could look directly into her eyes. “Because I knew telling you about your mother’s threat to call the cops on me wouldn’t have changed anything or what I had to do, except to possibly cause a huge rift between you and your mom.”
After that conversation with Joyce, and knowing he’d been backed into a corner, he’d walked up the stairs to Raevynn’s room, his heart heavy with dread, and proceeded to end things with her, despite her begging and pleading with him not to.
Raevynn’s eyes filled with tears. “You should have told me,” she whispered, her voice agonized.
He hated that he’d caused her so much pain, and his own chest ached with misery. “Trust me when I say that it wasn’t an easy decision, but I didn’t have much choice.” Gently, he wiped away the trail of moisture that escaped the corner of one eye. “Back then, all I could think was that I’d end up in jail and have a criminal record as a sex offender, my parents would be so disappointed in me, and I’d lose the full-ride scholar
ship to college I’d worked so hard for. My life would be shit, and you’d be dragged through all that, too. In comparison, breaking your heart, and my own, seemed less devastating for everyone involved. And honestly, I wanted you to go on Encore and compete and do great things with your talent without anyone or anything tying you down. And look at you now.”
He’d meant to make her smile, but instead she shook her head, still clearly upset at everything he’d just revealed. “My mother had no right to threaten you,” she said bitterly, placing her hands on his bare chest. “What we did was completely consensual.”
That was true, but Collin knew the law, and a judge, wouldn’t have seen it that way because of their ages. Bottom line, he’d been an adult, and she’d been a minor. It didn’t matter that she’d only been a few months away from turning eighteen herself.
“Your mother was trying to protect you,” he said, even if Collin didn’t agree with Joyce’s tactics or the harsh ultimatum she’d issued. But as Raevynn’s mother, he’d like to believe she’d had her daughter’s best interests at heart, even if the way she’d handled the situation had been misplaced.
“No, she was trying to control me,” Raevynn refuted, her hands curling into fists between them, her resentment palpable. “And she did.”
He gently smoothed her hair away from her face, trying to soothe her emotions just as much. “Don’t be angry.”
“I’m not angry with you,” she said, her eyes great big pools of misery. “I’m sad for us because I loved you so much and would have found a way to make it work between us.”
He tried not to think of her past tense use of the word love, but he did believe that Raevynn would have done everything she could to keep them together. But he also knew if she’d defied her mother back then, the fallout wouldn’t have been pretty and Collin would have most likely ended up serving time. Nobody would have won that war.
“But I am furious with my mom,” she went on, resentment vibrating in her tone. “I always had a feeling she was involved in our breakup somehow, but no one, not even you, would admit it.”
He winced at the accusation, because it was true. But seven years ago, with his and Raevynn’s future on the line, he did what he thought was best, for both of them. A part of him still believed he’d done the right thing, even if it had cost him the girl he loved.