“We?” I asked, my heart racing at the fantasy in my head, one I’d had countless times. From the three sets of eyes darkening with lust, my question was answered, and I gulped.
“What’s our safeword, Baby girl?” Killian asked, the hard edge that drove me crazy still coating his words.
“Gold,” I whispered, my throat dry as Ky reached out and ran a finger down the column of my throat.
“Go to our room, get naked, and kneel on the bed,” Keir said, the challenge in his eyes making a shiver of anticipation run down my spine. Without another word, I took the keys Kill was holding out, turned, and rushed toward the boys’ dorm.
Honestly, if it weren’t for him, his brothers, or my cousin Dani, I didn’t know how I would have made it at Thornhill. But he’d been relentless in his pursuit, and the moment I gave in, I was his, body and mind. He was possessive and passionate, but he was also devoted. I’d never felt more important or loved in my life. More than that, he taught me what freedom really was. Submitting to him freed me from my constant vigilance and the self-control that had been instilled in me from the moment I could talk.
“Hurry up in there, Princess!” Keir’s voice rang out, breaking me from my thoughts. That day was one of the best and worst of my life. It was the day before my eighteenth birthday, and they’d all shown me how much they needed me. But it was also the last time I’d seen them before Eros murdered my father and came to collect me, not even giving me a chance to say goodbye. Though what could I have said to them? Only highschoolers, we were removed, to a certain degree, from Family business, and to explain to them would have crossed the very boundaries that we’d always had been us.
Thoughts of them being angry and hurt had haunted me for years, and I hadn’t felt much better myself. Eros had known something was off and decided that school was beneath me, throwing me headfirst into missions instead. I killed more men during those first few months than any other time in my life, but it turned me into the robot I needed to be to survive.
There was only one time, a year later, that I tried to get a hold of them again, but Eros found out. Generally, he controlled everything that went out of the house, including our emails, calls, and texts. I’d managed to find a burner phone, but as soon as I started the call, he stormed in and smashed it. That punishment was one of the worst and enough to make me stop trying to live in the past. As time went on, the distance felt even further. It just solidified what I knew… My time for freedom was over… or so I thought at the time.
I’d dated here and there since then but rarely got to a second or third date. Those men were more a release of tension and nothing more. Now that I was free, dating felt like a waste of time, and my time was far too precious to waste. Which was why I wanted to push them away, or at least part of me did. There was a much bigger and scarier part of me that wanted those feelings back. The security of having them near. The freedom of escape that submitting to them gave me. And not just for a night, that too honest piece of me whispered, but forever.
If I gave them the chance, I’d lose myself in them and their beautiful darkness. But I couldn’t have any reason to hesitate when it came time to end the deal. I owned my life, and I would own my death.
Flashes of the night they’d shared me were all I saw as I got ready, pushing the darker memories away. The rough touches of their hands exploring me, the whispers of possession and conquest, the promises that I’d be all of theirs someday, not just Killian’s. Just the memories alone made me want to go out there and let them possess me, but the logical side of me wouldn’t allow it. They didn’t know me anymore; they were holding tight to their memories too, but things had changed.
Back then, I was stoic and quiet. However, on the inside, I was anything but. I’d been groomed to be a submissive girl by everyone but my grandfather. He’d known from age seven, as he loved to remind me, that I was just like him. That statement had haunted me for years until I realized we were nothing alike. Where Eros was bloodthirsty, I killed to survive. While he fed off of fear, I longed to leave that life.
Having all three of the Adrostos triplets out in my living room had me feeling conflicted and angry, bringing up memories that should have stayed buried. I’ve been independent here for three fucking years, and they think they can just walk in and take what they want from me?
But couldn’t they? The fact that I’d already let Kill fuck me and now all three were here, ordering me around, said as much. My internal conflict said one thing, but I kept doing another. It was enough to drive me crazy.
Your expiration date doesn’t mean you can’t have a bit of fun. You walked away once, and they survived. They’ll be fine. Plus, you’ve changed… why wouldn’t they? I mean, even I didn’t believe that lie. They were sincere, that much was certain. If they wanted this to be a fling, I would have been told by now.
Fuck… I do want this.
That one thought of giving myself permission had me excited. Dating them meant I’d get to see just what my defiance would do to them. And in turn, when they earned my submission, I’d get to finally let go again. But the fight to get there would be twice as fun.
Now to pick out a dress and test out that theory.
Heading for my closet, I let my robe pool at my feet, glancing over my dresses. My nights had been spent at home or working late, so it wasn’t an extensive array of options. I pulled out a black sparkly dress. It had a cinched waist and a red belt that tied around it. The hem hit mid-thigh, not leaving much covered, and the neckline plunged. It was the opposite of their sleazy dress, a hint of classy but sexy enough to draw attention.
Once I’d pulled it on, leaving my bra and underwear behind just to make them suffer a little, I pulled on a pair of red stilettos that matched. I was well practiced in heels despite not wearing them much the last few years. As I got more involved in the Family, Eros had insisted I dress the part. Where the men had suits and ties, I had black dresses and stilettos. The click of them across the floor made me feel all-powerful and confident as fuck. They were different enough from who I was before that it was like living a separate life. Just another healthy coping mechanism courtesy of my fucked up family.
Glancing at my appearance in the full-length mirror, I grinned. It was like finding another part of me I’d kept hidden. The woman looking back at me was oozing confidence. The heels made my legs look a mile long, and I knew I’d drive them crazy.
After a quick hair and makeup session, I picked my robe back up and tied it around me. Teasing them could easily become my favorite game, knowing the end result would be that much more electric. Because I had no illusion that this night wouldn’t end in sex of some kind, if not more than one.
Their voices drifted into the room, but as soon as I opened my door, they quieted down. The sharp click of my heels was the only soundtrack to my strut down the hallway, and they all turned to face me. Ky’s mouth quirked up in a smirk when he saw my robe, and Keir was as impassive as ever, but Kill looked ready to snap.
“What the fuck is this, Baby Girl?” he asked, his warning loud and clear.
“I decided I didn't want to go,” I said defiantly, using the bored, plain expression that I’d plaster over my face when I was dragged to meetings with Eros. I wanted to gauge their reaction, see how they handled a not-so-submissive Sana.
“Excuse me? You want to try again?” he ground out, getting up and stalking forward. I tried to step back, but he was ripping my robe open before I could. Ky let out a laugh, taking in my dress.
“Damn,” Keir cursed, his eyes heating as he slowly ran his gaze over me. “Kill, chill out.” The order was clear, and Killian nodded despite the growl that managed to escape.
“What’s with the anger, Kill? That’s not like you,” I snarked, crossing my arms. The action pushed my breasts up, and all three sets of eyes went directly to the display, that little bit of power hitting me like a drug. I laughed and shook my head, keeping my eyes
on my former boyfriend.
“You left,” he said darkly, “no word, no call, no apology. For eleven fucking years, I wondered about you, Baby Girl. And now you’re back with no explanation? You have an apartment, a job, fuck, even a favorite coffee shop. You’ve been here long enough to create a life, which is definitely way too fucking long to not reach out to me, to us. Fuck no. We will have that conversation.”