“Your dog shit in my flowers.”
He grimaced. Great. Jack turned around and took a good long sip from his tumbler as he eyed up his visitor.
“Miss Ella.”
“James.”
An eyebrow shot up. The woman called him James even though Jack had told her several times that James had nothing to do with his name. He was Jack. Nothing more, nothing less. Just, Jack.
She was a small little woman with delicate features, and he had a pretty good idea that she had been quite the beauty back in the day. Her white hair was pulled into a casual bun that sat at the nape of her neck, her lips were bright pink. She wore a dress that dwarfed her frame, the black and yellow print god-awful to look at coupled with the purple rain boots she wore. A red rose was stuck haphazardly into her hair, and it was in danger of falling out.
Coco, the little shit in question, sat in her arms as if he had every right to be there, panting happily, looking between the both of them.
“Can I get you a drink?” he asked, not because he was being polite but because he already knew the answer.
“I don’t drink and neither should you.”
She really was the crankiest person he’d ever met.
“Ah,” he replied conversationally. “But everyone’s allowed a vice or two, don’t you think?”
She let Coco jump to the floor and smoothed the big wrinkles in her dress. But when she glanced up at him, for just that one second Jack caught a glimpse of something he’d never seen before. He wasn’t exactly sure what it was, and it was gone before he could get a handle on it, but there were more layers to Miss Ella than he thought.
“So where were you?” she ignored his question with one of her own and helped herself to an overly ripe apple in the basket on the counter.
“Did you miss me?” Jack downed his drink and poured himself another. His mood was still black, but it was easing a bit. He wasn’t sure if it was because the scotch was just that damn good, or if Miss Ella was taking the edge off.
She scowled. “What in tarnation did Grace do to her hair?” She clucked and bit into the apple. “I told that girl there was no way in hell any man in his right mind would look twice at a woman with hair like hers.”
Miss Ella looked up at him. “Do you know what she told me?”
Jack shook his head, enjoying the burn from his scotch and thinking a couple more should just about do it.
“She told me that she didn’t give a damn.” Miss Ella took another bite. “Imagine that. A girl that young and already so jaded. Makes you wonder.”
“Hmmm?” he asked, not really paying attention.
“Makes you wonder what’s wrong with all you Simons.”
Jack tried to hide a grin but wasn’t entirely successful, judging from the dark look on Ella’s face.
“I watch that there Hollywood Tattler, and I know that most of you are up to no good.”
Jesus, Jack thought, glancing at the clock. I’m gonna need another bottle of scotch to get me through.
“It’s a miracle that your brother Beau is settled. My goodness, that boy was dipping his wick into more places than was proper.”
Jack nearly lost a mouthful of scotch at that comment and had to turn away and clear his throat.
“And your cousin Cooper. Well, he’s nothing but a hound dog. Why just last week, he was seen leaving some married woman’s house.” Her eyes got narrow with disgust. “A married woman’s house.”
Huh. That was new. Jack wondered who she was.
“And you…” She was glaring at him now so Jack set down his empty tumbler on the counter.
“Ella—“
“It’s Miss Ella to you Jack Simon. I’ve got at least forty years on you, and that demands a certain amount of respect. It also means that I’ve got some advice to hand out, and you’re going to listen.”