She stared at the bag in his hands for several moments.
“And then what?” she whispered.
“Then you can go home, and we’ll figure out the rest. If you’re pregnant we’ll deal with it. If not, well…” He shrugged but didn’t say anything more.
She reached for the bag, and he let her take it, his heart now thudding heavily as she tossed it back onto the counter. Her lips parted, her breathing became short and erratic. That something he felt earlier was back. That something was brewing. He felt it settle between them. Felt it settle inside him.
Her eyes were lowered, the long lashes sweeping across her cheeks and throwing shadows. Was she shaking?
“What if I don’t…” She blew out a long breath, eyes still averted. “What if I don’t want to go home?” she whispered.
That thing inside him, whatever the hell it was, unfurled, firing off a shot of adrenaline to every cell in his body. He was hot, so damn hot and tight from the strength of it, that he growled like an animal. Eyes narrowed, he reached for her, a hand on her chin, forcing her to look up at him.
“What are you saying exactly?” he asked carefully, wanting to get this right. No more room for misunderstandings. Not now.
For a second, he thought she was going to bolt. But then her hands slipped up over his forearms, holding him in place, and she licked that damn mouth, her tongue lingering in the corners for a heartbeat.
“I’m saying that I’m sorry for what happened five years ago. I’m sorry for Belize. I’m sorry for a lot of things, but most of all I’m sorry that I hurt you.” She paused, eyes wide and shiny. “I never wanted that Jack. I was trying to protect you and it just went all wrong. If I could go back and change things, I would. But I can’t. I can only change right now and right now I don’t want to be anywhere else other than here with you.”
Jack was silent. What the hell did he say to that? This was the last thing he’d expected to hear. He’d thought about Donovan and their situation all day and the only scenario he’d considered was her taking the damn test and leaving for LA in the morning.
“Fuck,” he muttered, yanking his hands from her and taking a step back. “Jesus Christ, Donnie.” He ran his hands through his hair, eyes on her. He was pissed off, but he didn’t know what the hell he was pissed off at. Donovan for throwing a curveball just when he’d finally decided enough was enough, or himself for actually entertaining the idea of Donovan. Of the two of them together.
How crazy was that?
“There are things that you don’t know,” she said softly, lower lip trembling as if she was about to cry. “Things that I have to tell you and I will. I promise I will but I just…”
“Just what?” he said darkly. What the hell was she doing to him?
“Can we have this time together? These few days? Can we feel things out? See if we can make us work before we let the rest of the world in?”
Unbelievable. His anger and whatever the hell else was knocking around inside him ramped up something fierce.
“
Two days ago, you wanted nothing to do with me and now you want to feel things out? Can you see why I have a problem with that?”
She nodded. “I do. I get it. But you can’t deny that there’s still something between us. That it never really went away. I feel it Jack, and I know you do too.”
“Wanting and loving are two different things.” His nostrils flared, and his voice was rough. What the hell? She was hitting him with this shit now?
“Five years ago I thought I had it all. I had you and a life that looked damn good to me. You were it. I didn’t want anyone else. I didn’t look at anyone else. I would have done whatever it took to make it work, but you never asked me to. You didn’t say shit. We had a fight and then you just ended us. You ended what we had.” His voice rose and his anger increased.
She winced. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry doesn’t cut it. Not now. Not even then. Thing is? It doesn’t matter if you’re sorry now, because it doesn’t change anything. Whatever we had died. That’s the straight up truth right there. I may still want you, but I sure as hell don’t love you.”
He held her gaze steady so she would know he wasn’t bullshitting, and still his anger ramped up. He wanted her to yell back. Hell, he was in the mood for some kind of fight right about now. Anything to make the deadness inside him go away.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“That doesn’t sound like you, Donnie. What the hell? Okay? That’s all you got?”
She took a step forward and placed her hand over his heart. “It’s all I got,” she replied.
Slowly, so slowly that the seconds felt like minutes, she moved until her body was flush against him. Every. Single. Inch. He was hot and pissed off and horny as hell.
He glared at her, hoping she’d pull away before they did something stupid like sleep together. But she didn’t pull away. She pressed into him as if she belonged there, her soft breasts, that tempting mouth and all that hair, there for the taking.