“I’m not angry, Donovan.”
Liar.
“I’m not anything where you’re concerned. I’m the guy who’s gonna stop this right now. I’m the guy who’s done.”
He pointed to the bag on the counter as he strode past her and headed for the stairs. He needed a shower, and he needed to sleep.
“Do us both a favor and take the test.”
Chapter Twenty
* * *
Donovan was up before sunrise, but Jack was already gone. Dejected, she stared at the rumpled sheets on his bed—rumbled sheets that looked a hell of a lot like her own—and then closed his bedroom door.
She’s hardly slept a wink but somehow had managed to miss him leaving the house. He’d probably gone for a run.
Coco had been curled up at the edge of Jack’s bed but jumped down just in time to run ahead of Donovan, his little tail wagging crazily as he yipped all the way down.
She wandered downstairs, flipping the switch beside the sink and winced as the light flashed on. The beginnings of a headache pushed in on her skull and she sighed, searching for some pain meds in the cupboard. She took a few tablets with a glass of water and barely managed to swallow them. Crap. Seems as if her throat was sore. She so didn’t have time to come down with something, but she wasn’t surprised.
When was the last time she’d had a decent night’s sleep?
A coffee cup was in the sink, and she rinsed it out, wiping it dry and setting it back inside the cupboard, her actions automatic because her brain was so damn fuzzy. She couldn’t get Jack out of her heard.
Couldn’t get the look in his eyes out of her dreams. He really had no feelings left for her. He’d said it last night. He was done.
And Donovan had no idea what to do about it. Did she just let the chips fall where they may? Did she fight for what she wanted? Did she fight for Jack Simon now or was it too late?
She should have fought for him five years ago—fought for their love. Had she really been that weak?
“Derek would have destroyed him,” she whispered fiercely.
But would he have? Had he played Donovan? Would he have exposed the video and those pictures knowing it would end his connection to Jack as well?
“Jesus,” she said, as a wave of nausea rolled over her. It made her sick every time she thought about it. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to blot out the images but couldn’t.
Derek had showed it to her that next morning but all Donovan could take were the first few moments. She was naked. Spread out on the bed that she and Jack shared and Derek was climbing on top of her. She couldn’t remember anything else from that night other than her fight with Jack and him storming out before dinner was over.
“Doesn’t matter,” she said dully. It was too late since Cooper Simon had somehow managed to get his grabby hands on it.
Deciding she’d rather not think about that night, Donovan glanced down at Coco. “Looks like it’s just you and me,” she said to the dog, tugging on the edge of her sleep pants and hiking them up.
Cold, she wrapped her arms around herself and wandered outside, walking the length of the porch that overlooked the lake. Other than the gentle current lapping against the dock, she heard nothing and saw nothing. The Campbell’s cottage was in darkness as were most of the houses that dotted the lake, and in the distance she spied the first rays of pink and yellow creeping over the horizon.
Coco barked and she glanced down. “I guess you’re hungry.”
After rummaging for some dog food, she set down a bowl for Coco and grabbed the pharmacy bag that was still on the kitchen counter from the night before. Her fingers shook a little as she pulled out the small blue and white box. She set it on the counter, worrying her bottom lip as she stared at it.
Should she do the test now? Did she want to know?
Her stomach rolled just thinking about it. She turned the box over in her hands and before she could change her mind, headed up to her room. Donovan grabbed her sweats, running shoes and a ball cap before heading to the bathroom.
She set the box on the sink carefully and got dressed. Once her shoes were pulled on and tied, she brushed her teeth and then braided her hair, listening for Jack’s return. But there was nothing. No Jack and no reason not to do the stupid test.
Why was she still here? He didn’t love her, and she was a fool to think he’d even want to try again. Not after everything.
He doesn’t love me. He will never love me.