Chapter Twenty-one
Teague waited until dark to walk over and see Sabrina. It took him that long to get his head straight on account that it had been one hell of a day. Jack had always managed to get under his skin because the man was relentless and could argue for hours.
The arguments he’d posed as to why Teague should stay on North American soil had been impressive. Yes the political unrest posed imminent danger for Americans. Yes Dallas most likely was dead. Yes, he might be a complete fucking moron to even entertain the idea of going back.
But all of that was for nothing because the one thing that Jack couldn’t understand was the one thing inside Teague that wouldn’t let him stay behind. And maybe it was the soldier in him, the Seal who’d had the backs of the men in his unit. Maybe it was the part of him that had seen too much death and destruction. Or maybe it was a fatal flaw in his genetic makeup, a gene that made him seek out danger with no thought to his own safety.
In the end, the reasons for it didn’t matter because the moment Bowen called Teague, he was done.
He had to go.
He paused at the bottom of the stairs leading to Sabrina’s house and stared up at the soft light that fell from her windows. It was early evening and the crickets were out in full force, singing their night song. He caught sight of a bat, swooping low across the upper deck, searching for mosquitos, and watched until it disappeared into the trees.
Other than the insects, it was quiet and he knew that the kids must be in bed or their excited babble and giggles would easily have echoed into the night. Sabrina was up there alone, waiting for him.
And God knows he needed to see her.
Teague climbed the stairs and just as he was about to knock, the door opened. He found himself staring down into a face that he knew he’d be thinking about every single night he was gone. It would haunt him. Comfort him. And hopefully it would be the very thing to bring him back.
Sabrina was in an old sweatshirt that was way too big on her and he was going to assume it belonged to her late husband. Fluffy pink slippers adorned her feet, and he found himself wishing he could see her multi colored toes.
“If it’s too late,” he began but stopped when she moved aside. Teague walked into the house and glanced around. “Kids in bed?”
Sabrina nodded. “They were tuckered out. Had a late night at Allie’s and then all afternoon on the beach in the sun did them in. Harry was falling asleep at the dinner table.”
She fingered the edge of her sweatshirt. “Jack wasn’t very happy when he left.”
There it was. Now there was no hiding.
Teague sighed and shrugged. “No. He doesn’t understand the situation and he sure as hell doesn’t understand me.”
Sabrina was silent for a few moments and then she pointed to the deck. “Do you want to sit outside?”
He almost said yes, but then he realized that the cover of darkness was too easy. This right here needed to be done under the unrelenting exposure of light, because there could be no room for error, no miscommunication. No wishful thinking for an easy fix. This right here was gonna be as real as it gets and aside from his mother, Sabrina was the only person on the planet who he needed to understand him.
Teague didn’t say yes or no. Instead he grabbed her hand and led her to the sofa in the living room. He sat down and waited for her to do the same. When she did finally sit, she kept some space between them. That was smart of her—a form of self-preservation—but he hated it all the same.
She folded her hands onto her lap and glanced up at him, nearly tearing his heart out when he saw the hurt and pain in her eyes. It was gone, so fast that another man might easily convince himself it wasn’t there. But Teague had lived with that kind of pain for a long time now, and he knew what it looked like.
He knew what it felt like. And the feeling sucked. He hated that he’d been the one responsible for it. Sabrina deserved so much more.
“I’m leaving for Syria next week.”
“Jack told me.”
Teague frowned. “What else did he say?”
“Nothing. He just thought I should know.”
Teague wasn’t surprised. His brother had torn a strip off him when he’d realized Teague and Sabrina had been together. Jack had said he was a selfish son-of-a-bitch to get involved with a young widow and two kids.
Teague couldn’t argue with that. His brother was right.
“I was going to tell you this morning and I’m sorry that you had to find out that way.”
Her bottom lip trembled and he reached over, smoothing her mouth with a gentle caress. “Hey,” he said softly. “I wish this wasn’t so hard.”
“I know, but it is.” She leaned into his hand. “Jack doesn’t get why you put yourself in danger again and again. He doesn’t understand what would make a man chase a story that could kill him. It was hard for me to defend you because I have to be honest with you, Teague, I don’t get it either.”