“You’re acting weird, Liam. Are you sure you’re well? You’re clearly not yourself.” Kathy carries on like nothing has happened.
I don’t stop walking until I make it to my bedroom, then I strip off my clothes. I need to get the smell of him off me. I have to erase him from my memory. Maybe that will help with the pain.
When I step into the shower my hand goes to my stomach. What if he got me pregnant? A sob builds in my throat and I shake my head. No, I don’t believe it. If this was all a plan he wouldn’t have been that reckless. Maybe he can’t have kids or something. I cry so hard I have to slide down the tile and sit on the floor of the shower. I pull my legs in, letting the warm water fall over me, and I close my eyes wondering if the ache of loss will ever leave me.
9
Liam
One week later…
“I’m not doing this for you. I’m doing this for her,” Sammy says as she glares at me.
“I know. I just want to make things right.”
She clenches her jaw like she’s trying not to curse me straight to hell. I wouldn’t blame her if she did. I already feel like complete shit, so anything she has to throw at me can’t possibly make me feel worse.
“She’s acting like someone died,” she says as she looks away. “She’s worse than when she lost both her grandparents. I don’t know how to pull her out of it.”
I was wrong when I thought I couldn’t feel any worse. “I’m going to fix this. I know I can.”
Sammy drops the basket of food on the ground at my feet and turns to give me her back. She starts to walk away, but before she does she stops and lets out a long sigh.
“You better. Or I’ll cut your heart out and give it to her for Christmas.”
“If she doesn’t forgive me, I’ll hand you the knife.”
That causes her to look back at me over her shoulder. “You really do love her, don’t you?”
“Yes,” I say simply, because it’s the truth. And I swore that’s the only thing coming out of my mouth from now on—the truth.
“She’ll be here soon,” she says, then walks through the palm trees and back toward the Mermaid.
I’ve been staying at the lagoon since Cyrus marched me to my plane and kicked me off the island. As soon as my plane touched down on the mainland I paid a guy in a boat to take me back over at night and drop me off on the opposite side of the island. Then I hiked back in and around the high cliffs that line the lagoon. Nicole was right, no one would dare come this way unless they knew where they were going and what they were looking for. I didn’t have much in the way of supplies and I needed help with making things right.
When I snuck up on Sammy while she was getting into her car one night she wasn’t happy with me. But before she could scratch my eyes out I told her my plan and how I was going to win Nicole back. It wasn’t easy. I thought she was going to shoot me the first time she saw me, but when I explained to her my plans she helped me put them into action. She met me by the palm trees near the Mermaid because I wasn’t going to tell her about the lagoon. This is a sacred spot for Nicole and I’ve already taken so much from her. I couldn’t take this secret, too.
I grab the basket Sammy dropped and head back past the trees and walk the mile through the bamboo to get to the lagoon. Everything is finally in place and now all I have to do is wait. I couldn’t figure out a way to get her alone where she’d be forced to hear me. So, I’ve done my best to be patient and wait for her. I know in my heart she’s coming. I can feel the pull of this place just like I feel the way my heart is connected to hers. Today is the day.
I was devastated when I watched Nicole walk away, and I knew I couldn’t live if she didn’t love me. I’ve done everything in my power to fix this mess and to hopefully turn things around. I’m nervous as I dig my toes into the white sand and wait for her to appear. I glance over at the little campsite I’ve been living in for the past week and think about how hard it’s been. But it’s been nothing compared to the pain of missing Nicole. I’d live out here for the rest of my life if only she would forgive me.