“Who?” He tried not to smile but failed badly.
Blue made a face. “The woman who took Tawny to school? Melissa?”
“She’s okay.”
“She wants you.”
“You think?”
“Yes.” Blue stood in front of him. “I think.”
“I’m not interested in her. At all.”
Blue grinned. “Good.” Her smiled slowly faded, and she cleared her throat. “What’s going on with you, Cam? You were so preoccupied last night. I can tell something’s wrong.”
Cam leaned back against the island and exhaled a long, slow breath. He didn’t want to say it because it made it more real. But he found himself wanting to share the burden. “My dad has cancer.”
Blue’s mouth fell open. “Oh, Cam. I’m so sorry.”
Throat tight, he nodded. “Thanks. It’s hard to believe. He’s always been that guy who seemed invincible to me. The guy I could always count on. He was always there. Tall. Big. Strong as hell. No one messed with my dad. But cancer doesn’t give a shit, and it will take on anyone. My mom won’t talk about it much, and that worries me almost as much as the cancer.”
“Of course it does.”
He was quiet, wondering how much he should share. “It meant a lot. You staying here with me last night.”
“It was nice.”
“I could get used to it.” He watched her closely and saw the hesitation.
“Cam. There’s so much about me you don’t know.”
“I could say the same.” He knew this was crunch time. Whether he wanted it to be or not, they were at that point of no return. They would either move forward—which was what he wanted. Stay in the same place—he wasn’t a fan of. Or walk away from whatever the hell it was they were doing.
“I don’t think any of the skeletons rattling around your closet can compare to mine.”
“Does this have anything to do with Arizona?” he asked quietly.
Surprise, or maybe shock, widened her eyes, and the color left her face. “How do you know about Arizona?” Her voice rose, and she stepped back.
“I overheard the conversation you had with Edward months ago. I don’t know what went down with you and your brother, and I don’t care. You need to know that your life before me doesn’t matter.”
She shook her head. “But it does, Cam. Our pasts define who and what we are. My past is not pretty. I made mistakes, and I’ve been through situations that I didn’t handle in a way that maybe I should have. Mistakes have consequences.”
“We’ve all got baggage, Blue. We’ve all done or said things we’re not proud of. If you’re smart, you learn from that shit and move on.” He moved closer to her. “You’re a smart woman. I want you in my life, Blue. Permanently. I want us, you, me and Tawny, to be a family.”
“Cameron, I—”
“I love you.”
“Cam.” It was a whisper.
“I’ve never said that to another woman. Not ever. Not even Tawny’s mother.” Crunch time was long over. He was at the finish line and would either win this race or lose. “This is going to sound like a cliché, but I’ve never felt like this before.” He took a moment because he knew he had to get this right. “You stay with me hours after you leave. Your voice is in my head. I can’t get rid of it. Your smile is in my soul, and if I could keep it there forever, I would. I want to have kids with you. I want a home with you. I want…”
Christ, he was all in and couldn’t help himself.
“I want it all, Bluebell.”
He dipped his head, leaned his forehead against hers. “Tell me you feel the same.”