My heart rate picked up with the apprehension that seized me. “I just want our friendship back.”
“Yeah, but you want more too, don’t you?”
“Nash doesn’t do more and neither do I.”
Roxie hit me with her trademark directness. “I think you want more from
him, and I think you’re scared to admit it to yourself, let alone to him.”
It was exactly what I’d been thinking about all week. I hadn’t been able to figure it out though. “I’m so confused about it all,” I admitted, “I don’t want to want him, and I’m not sure if I just want sex from him or if I actually do want more. But if I do work out that I’m after a relationship with him, then I’m screwed because he doesn’t do them.”
She nodded thoughtfully. “No, he doesn’t, does he? But maybe it’s why he’s avoiding you, girl. Maybe he does want something with you and is confused about it too. I think you need to go and talk to him.”
I sighed. “Trying to talk to Nash about this is hard work.”
“Well shit, girl, the potential sex has to make it worth it, right?” She winked at me.
My body tingled just thinking about that. Hell, she had a point.
***
“Can’t get enough of the place?” Griff quizzed me, looking up from the paperwork he was doing.
I dumped my bag on the table and sagged into the chair in front of him. Ignoring his question, I asked, “Why are you doing paperwork? You hate that stuff.”
“Cody’s busy with staffing problems and Scott asked me to take care of it.”
I studied him. Griff was ruggedly sexy and had a commanding presence that you just knew not to fuck with. But if you didn’t fuck with him, he was the kind of man who would always be on your side, and I had a deep respect for him. I’d had some of the most amazing and deep conversations with him over the years when he’d let me in; he was a scary guy but he was proof that there was beauty in everyone if you looked hard enough.
Griff was good with silence, and we sat quietly for awhile before he looked up at me and asked, “You after Nash?”
“Huh?” I wasn’t sure if he meant tonight or in general.
“Figured you’d come in to see him seems it’s your day off and there’s no other reason for you to be here. He’s out the front somewhere.”
“Probably with some skank,” I muttered under my breath, jealousy stabbing me with a sharp knife.
“You might be surprised,” he murmured, thoughtfully.
“And I might not be.”
He put down his pen and gave me his full attention. “You got something going on with him?”
I hesitated for a moment, but then threw caution to the wind. “No. We slept together once, but that’s all.”
He scowled. “Hell of a way to fuck with a friendship.”
“Thanks, Griff. I can always count on you to state the bloody obvious,” I grumbled.
“Shit, Velvet, I thought you had your head screwed on better than that. You’re a tough bitch on the outside but I know that under all that bullshit, you’re just like every other woman.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
He leant closer to me. “It means that sex isn’t always just sex. For you to give that to a friend, to Nash... fuck, it tells me you want more from him.”
Conflicting emotions assaulted me; my stomach was a knot of anxiety at the thought of what he’d said being true. Before I could form a reply, we were interrupted by a voice at the door. “Griff, Cody needs you out the front, brother.”
Nash.