“You’ve never been like this in your sleep the other times I’ve slept next to you. What’s happened to cause it?”
Expelling a long breath, I shared with him what my mother had told me on the phone the day before. “After all these years, my father has just recently contacted my mother. He wants to see us all.” My voice cracked as I added, “He wants to meet me.”
Havoc’s eyes searched mine. “Is your mother going to see him?”
Pain almost swallowed me at the thought of my mother having to deal with this. My father had shredded her once and she’d built herself back up, but on the phone I’d heard her agony. My mother was one of the most resilient women I knew, but after that phone call, I also knew my father had the ability to break her. “My mother only ever loved one man in her life, my father. Him leaving almost killed her from what I’ve been told by Nash. She’s told me she won’t see him again, but, fuck, men have this way of fucking women up and making us do things we swore we’d never do. I hope she sticks to her guns.”
He nodded and when he spoke, his voice was hoarse. “Yeah, men do have a knack of doing that.” It sounded like he was going to say more, but he cut himself off and gulped down some air.
We sat in silence for a while, each lost in our own thoughts, until he asked, “Do you want to see him?”
Torment sliced through me.
No.
Yes.
No.
I shook my head.
Vigorously.
“No, I don’t want to fucking see the man who chose to walk away from me before he even met me and who then chose to never have anything to do with me…” My words rushed out in an angry, breathless torrent that I had no control over.
The man who'd scored wounds into my heart that would never heal.
My breaths were coming hard and fast, and hatred wrapped my chest so tightly that I began to struggle for those breaths. Just as a fog of blackness settled over me, strong arms embraced me and pulled me against a warm body.
A body of protection.
I sank against him and let my tears fall as I recovered my breath.
His fingers threaded through my hair and his lips met my forehead.
He held me while I cried, never once easing his grip.
When I finally looked up at him, I found eyes full of compassion staring back at me. “Thank you,” I whispered.
He nodded, still not letting me go. Instead, he pulled me with him to a lying position on the bed and curled his body around mine. “You need more sleep.”
I closed my eyes and started to drift off.
Although I would have expected it, the last thought that ran through my mind wasn’t about my father.
It was about Havoc.
Maybe we can see where this goes.
* * *
“I’ve gotta head out to take care of some club stuff.”
I watched Havoc as he sat on the end of the bed texting someone. He’d woken me up for sex just after seven and after blowing my mind with a hard and fast fuck, I’d joined him in the shower for more.
As he finished with his phone, I straddled him and sat on his lap, looping my hands around his neck. His eyes trailed down my naked body and he groaned. “Jesus, babe, can you put some clothes on?”
I smiled. “That’s a strange request coming from you.”