All I wanted to hear was that he was going to be okay, but whenever I asked that question, they gave me their standard answer.
Stable.
Fucking stable.
I refused to go home again. I’d hated leaving him that first day. I wasn’t doing it again. I put work on hold and took up residence at the hospital. This meant Nash and I bickered constantly. He came and went a few times, and whenever he visited, he tried to boss me into leaving. In the end, Mum got sick of it and told him to leave if he was going to keep arguing with me.
So by the end of the second day, he and I sat next to each other, arms folded over our chests, both of us with a scowl on our faces.
“Fuck, hospitals suck,” I declared, blowing out a harsh breath.
“Won’t argue with you there, babe,” Nash agreed.
It was nearing 9 p.m. and we were alone after Mum and Velvet had gone home for the night, and Yvette had
left us to grab some dinner.
“Do you believe in heaven?” I asked.
“Yeah.”
“And hell?”
“Yep.”
“So you believe in God and the Devil and all that?” We’d never had this conversation and besides killing time, I was interested to know his beliefs.
“Yes. I have to.”
I turned to him. “Because of Aaron?” His son who had died.
“I believe Aaron is in heaven and I believe it’s a better place than Earth. It’s the only thing that got me through some bad days.” I heard the raw emotion in his voice.
I placed my hand over his. “He’s definitely in a better place, Nash. And you’re going to see him again one day.”
His jaw clenched and I knew this had turned into a hard conversation for him. I loved him all the more for continuing it. “Yeah.”
The doors to the ICU opened at that moment and a nurse walked our way. “Carla?” she asked.
“Is he awake?”
She nodded and I almost sagged in relief. “Yes, you can come through and see him.”
Nash gripped my hand and pulled me up. We followed her in and a couple of minutes later, I was looking at the man who had taken up a lot of space in my heart.
“Darlin’.”
It was one word, but it meant the world to me.
He looked better and sounded better.
And I felt it in my bones.
He’s going to make it.
28
Havoc