“We can try to be friends again, as adults this time,” he suggested gently.
Georgiana was already shaking her head. “It isn’t right, is it? Your fiancé won’t appreciate you being friends with me. Face it, your life is taking you into marriage. Mine has brought me here. Even if you ignored the miles apart, our lives are going in completely opposite directions. We only had a childhood in common, and that is over now. If you wish to stay my parents’ messenger then that is your choice, but don’t except me to do what you ask of me anymore than I will accede to their wishes.”
Will nodded. He had to accept t
hat not least because the evidence of her feminine maturity was before him, lovingly encased in black and red silk. She was stunning. So damned beautiful she made his teeth ache, and it made it even more difficult for him to walk away from her. He suspected that if he did, it would be the last time he saw her. It was awful.
His sleep had been ruined because of the haunting images of her nakedness that had refused to leave him. Now, having seen her up a tree, and been the recipient of her amorous kisses, he would never rest until he saw with his own eyes that she was alright. Now that he had seen her list, the rest of the items were things that were likely to put her reputation at risk if anybody ever caught her. Not only that, but curricle racing was dangerous. If she tried it, Heaven only knows what would happen to her.
Face it, you just can’t walk away, he sighed.
Strangely, he had never been this reluctant to walk away from any other woman before, especially Penelope Smedgrove. Although he liked Penelope; she was charming, witty, and had excellent manners and connections, he didn’t experience one ounce of the feelings that slammed into him whenever he was with Georgiana.
Georgiana made him so irritable sometimes that he wanted to peel his own skin off. At other times, she was so darned funny that she had him in stitches. Most of the time, he found himself storing up amusing anecdotes and experiences to share with her the next time they met. Life was never boring around her; it was as adventurous as she was. To not have her in his life anymore was something he couldn’t countenance.
“Georgiana?”
Georgiana studied him. As she did, the now familiar ache deep in the centre of her chest began to build again. She suspected that this would be the last time they were ever alone again. Should she make him understand? After all, she wouldn’t have to face the embarrassment of having to see him every time she stepped out of the house.
If only it was that simple, she sighed as she took another slug of brandy.
Strangely, the rather cosy warmth the alcohol had given her after the first few sips had now turned into a deep melancholy that made her want to cry.
“I am aware that you mean well,” Georgiana whispered. She forced herself to meet his gaze. “But you can’t help me.”
“You came here to fulfil your list of things to do.”
“My life has been so confined that I just need space. Everybody else is moving on with their life yet I am–was–stuck in Cecily’s world of social functions and snobbery. It is not for me. It is not who I am. I hate it,” Georgiana whispered tearfully.
She realised then that it was the world Will lived in. He was a Lord of the realm, for Heaven’s sake. Part of a social elite who survived on connections and socialising with other wealthy, like-minded people. While it didn’t help ease her heartache, it brought forward wisdom that assured her she had done the right thing in stopping torturing herself. She had to accept that she would never belong in his world-it wasn’t for her. He wasn’t for her. He belonged to Penelope Smedgrove.
“I wish you well,” she replied, and offered him a wobbly smile. “Unfortunately, when your mother told Cecily you were to marry, Cecily launched into a strategic plan of wedding preparations that made me wonder if I was the one getting married. It was horrendous. It was impossible to tolerate any longer and I realised that I had to do something because nobody even listened to me anymore.”
Will suspected he was one of them and was immediately assaulted with guilt. It was clear that he hadn’t seen her because if he had he would have noticed just how stunningly gorgeous she was–both inside and out. She had changed so much, right under his very nose, and he had been too immersed in his own life to notice.
She is right. We are not children any more.
What this meant for their future he wasn’t sure yet. Somehow, he had to find a way of remaining a part of her life whether he married Penelope Smedgrove or not.
Will nodded. “If I am honest, Georgiana, I find your mother overbearing as well. I have no idea how you have managed to live with her for as long as you have. But, I have a long acquaintance with your family, and am somewhat obligated to help them if they call upon me.” He looked her in the eye. “Especially where you are concerned.”
In more romantic circumstances she would have been thrilled at his choice of words, if it were not for the fact that he was someone else’s fiancé. It made his comment bittersweet for Georgiana.
The silence thickened between them and began to grow uncomfortable. Will was unsure what to do or say to broach the stiffness that forced their gazes apart and set them a world away from each other.
“I need to go to bed.” She pushed out of her chair and staggered from one piece of furniture to another until she reached the door. When she looked back at him her eyes grew wide when she realised he had followed her and now stood directly behind her.
“Georgiana, just listen to me, please?”
“I am not going back,” she replied.
“Alright,” he sighed.
“I am not interested in any argument you put forth,” she said firmly. “I will write to inform them, of course I shall, but in my own time.”
“Good, that’s all I want you to promise me.”
She squinted suspiciously at him. “All?”