“I am still not going back to Cranbury,” she whispered.
Something inside her wondered if Will had already gone back, if only to make sure that nothing like that ever happened again. After all, in spite of what had happened between them last night, he was still due to marry Penelope Smedgrove. Last night had been a slight aberration; and something that shouldn’t ever happen again. As wonderful as it had been, as many of her girlish fantasies it had fulfilled, it still brought forth a wave of vulnerability that made her want to cry. It was difficult enough to try to forget about the man without having memories like that to try to banish as well.
It hurt to acknowledge it but, although it had been wonderful at the time, what they had shared last night was wrong on so many levels.
“Now what do I do?” she muttered. She picked up the list of adventures from the kitchen table and stared at it. Her first instinct was to scrunch it up and throw it in the fire. But, deep inside her heart, she couldn’t. After all, she wanted to experience life. That had been the whole purpose of making the list in the first place. Last night had taught her a lot. It had made her stop to consider what she truly wanted now, from herself, from him, from everything really. Whatever lingering guilt or worries she had been left with, she only had herself to blame for.
It bothered her that he hadn’t woken her before he had left the house. It worried her that he too regretted what they had shared but hadn’t stopped to talk to her about it. Instead, he had crept out while she was asleep and most probably didn’t intend to return. The worst thing that might happen would be that he intended to use what they had shared to try to persuade her to go back to her parent’s house.
“Well, it won’t happen,” she promised herself. “It can’t happen. Not now. Not after last night.”
She suspected that his regret would come from the fact that he was due to marry someone else and he had betrayed her whereas hers was down to the fact that she loved him yet he belonged to someone else. Deep in her heart she knew that she would never love another man the way she loved Will. Just seeing him made her heart flutter and her stomach flip with excited anticipation. She had never experienced it when she had met any other handsome bachelor. But she mustn’t let him see how much last night had affected her. If he had one hint of how much she loved him, and he realised how much influence he had on her decisions, it would open up a plethora of problems and difficulties she daren’t contemplate.
“What do I say to him?” she whispered. She dreaded the day she saw him again.
Quickly crossing ‘kissing a stranger’ off her list, she turned her attention to the next item and crossed off ‘getting drunk’ too. She also crossed off ‘skinny dipping’ and studied the rest of the items.
“Maybe I should dress as a man,” she mused. “That would make him wonder.”
She sighed. She had no enthusiasm for doing anything on the list today.
“Maybe I need to get out of the house for a while but do something mundane, like go for a walk.”
The front door began to rattle. The relief that swept through her when she watched Ruth enter the house and not Will was overwhelming, and she slumped back against the chair with a sigh of relief.
“He has been here again, hasn’t he?” Ruth declared when she saw her niece’s face. When Georgiana nodded slowly, Ruth shook her head in disgust. “It is obvious when he has been around because you are always fretful afterwards.”
“I am afraid it is worse than that,” Georgiana whispered.
While she daren’t tell her aunt what had happened, she could tell her about everything leading up to it. After all, if Will did try to argue his case with Ruth, then her experience with the brandy would be raised anyway. She hoped he would be a gentleman and not tell her aunt everything else.
“Go on.” Ruth stood still and waited.
“How is Mrs Merriweather?” Georgiana asked.
“She is still poorly but Mrs Delaney is looking after her while I get a change of clothing,” Ruth replied. “What did he do?”
“It isn’t what he did that’s the problem.”
“Alright, so what did you do?” Ruth corrected.
Georgiana looked bashful. “I was in my cups when he arrived. I have no idea how he got into the house. I didn’t realise he was here until he appeared right beside me. By that time, I was half way down a bottle of brandy.”
Ruth nodded and puffed out her cheeks inelegantly. Thoughtfully, she picked up her basket and carried it into the sink. She lifted a brow at Georgiana as she passed.
“You had better tell me the rest.” It wasn’t a request. There was a hint of steel in her aunt’s voice that Georgiana had never heard before. She realised then that Ruth’s sudden appearance at the house had something to do with what had happened here last night.
“I was wearing my red dress at the time,” Georgiana sighed. “I was in the conservatory eating grapes on the chaise.”
Ruth nodded. “What happened then?”
Georgiana’s cheeks were aflame, but she tried to ignore them and keep her mind on what had happened in the conservatory. “We had an argument. I have found out that when I am in my cups, I have a tendency to tell the truth and, well, I told him. Not all of it, but I told him that he is overbearing, and will not get me to go back to Cranbury.” She wrin
kled her nose up. “I told him to go home and marry Penelope Smedgrove, but I cannot remember the exact words because I was a bit hazy at the time.”
Ruth began to relax a little and sat down in the seat opposite her. “So you put him in his place, that’s good.”
Georgiana snorted and fell silent. “I have also learned that being drunk makes me ill the following morning.”