“Because God forbid you be involved in our community, with our friends. Why do you feel the need to distance yourself so much from our family?”
It was my turn to roll my eyes. He always turned it into that. I loved them, but was it so bad to want to do things my own way? Outside of their circle? To forge my own path and not to want to tie everything back to the Hutchinson Group so he could try and find a way to look better than his friends?
“When my father provided me with help in life, I took it.”
Because my grandpa had liked control even more than my father did.
“I don’t try and distance myself. I just like to do things how I prefer.”
“Your father just wants to be more involved in your life, Grant. That’s all,” Mom added.
On his terms. I would’ve only been good enough as a doctor if I’d studied oncology because of Maddy, and my charity work was only worthy if it involved the people he thought I should be connected to. I dated too much and, according to him, never wanted to grow up, and wasn’t thinking of my future when I didn’t want to be the ED lead or on the hospital committee. The list of ways I’d failed at being Grant Hutchinson the Third grew by the day.
“No,” I said. “He wants to run my life.” The same way they tried to run Maddy’s.
Dad began, “Excuse me?”
“Ryder’s home,” Maddy interrupted. The table went quiet, and yep, she’d done it. The attention officially switched from me to her.
“Did you see him?” Dad asked. “Is he trying to get you back?”
“What? No. He’s gay, Dad.”
“He wasn’t gay when he married you,” Mom replied.
“Yes,” I cut in. “He was. It’s not all as cut and dried as people think. Sexuality can be…confusing.”
“Did you see him?” Dad asked, the accusation clear in his tone.
“Jesus, Dad. Are you kidding me right now? What? Since I understand what Ryder might have been going through, because I’m bi, that means I must be fucking him?”
Mom tsked. “There’s no need to be crude, Grant.”
“Why? We all know that’s what he meant. Because I’m such a terrible person that I would sleep with my sister’s ex-husband?”
“That’s not what I meant,” Dad lied. But he had. He knew that as well as I did. He just felt guilty for thinking it. “You know how I get when it comes to Ryder. After the way he treated your sister… I can’t forgive that. He was her husband. He broke her heart. She loves him.”
My gaze darted toward Maddy. It had been five years since they divorced. She hadn’t dated at all since that I knew of, but…did she still love him? It wasn’t something we ever let ourselves talk about.
Maddy said, “I’m fine, happy, if I’m being honest. I’m not in love with Ryder anymore, and I wish him all the best. Just because I’m alone doesn’t mean I don’t choose to be. Maybe I’m just…trying to figure out who I am. Now, if we could leave me and Hutch alone and finish dinner, that’d be great. I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”
The three of us sat there stunned as Madison took a drink of her water, then a bite of her food, as if nothing had happened. But it had. That was the most she’d said about Ryder, about her lack of relationship or anything else, since the divorce. I think we’d all assumed she was still hung up on the guy—who, while I understood his situation in some ways, I was angry with in others. Because he had hurt my sister.
“Madison—”
“I said I don’t want to talk about it, Mom. Let me be.”
Dad’s jaw tightened.
Mom frowned.
I…smiled. Good for her. I didn’t know what was going on in my sister’s life, and evidently, she wasn’t ready to share it with me or anyone else, but for the first time in five years—hell, maybe ever—I was excited to see what the future held for her. I had hope she was going to break free of the bubble our parents tried so hard to keep her in.
TheDoctorIsIn: Are you there?
It was silly, sending a message to a man I didn’t know simply because I was feeling down—down and tired of the back-and-forth with my family, of never feeling like I was enough.
GoodWithHisHands: I’m here. Are we doing this now? Sending messages when the other wasn’t already online?
TheDoctorIsIn: I clearly am. And you answered.
GoodWithHisHands: I did, and I’d do it again. Was just acknowledging the change. Did you miss me?
TheDoctorIsIn: I don’t know you.
GoodWithHisHands: But you missed me. Admit it. You like me.
I smiled. He was good at making me do that, though I hadn’t quite pieced together why. Or why it was different with him. It wasn’t as if I was unhappy, as if I didn’t laugh or grin often, but he made me do it a bit…more. Fuck, I was losing my shit.