I watch her grind herself against him while he looks down on her seductively as she dances. His hands are on her behind. He’s smiling as he says something and then they laugh together, and I feel myself die a little inside.
They are not just fucking.
They have feelings for each other.
He kisses her again and his hands go to the back of her head to hold her exactly how he wants her. Their kiss is long, deep, and erotic.
Through blurred vision, I try to make myself look away.
No.
I can’t look away because I know when I leave this nightclub two of the most important people in my life will no longer be a part of it. The floor sways beneath me. How is this possible?
What have I done to deserve this betrayal?
I can’t move.
He kisses her again and they fall back against a wall where he pins her and then they start to really go for it.
No. Stop it!
The tears burst the dam and I start to stride toward them as the adrenaline hits its crescendo. I need to stop them, stop everything.
Stop kissing her, you fucking asshole!
Please, stop it!
But then I pause mid-step.
Don’t do this. Don’t lower yourself. Go home and move out. Don’t give them a chance to deny or defend it.
I am better than this.
I stand for a moment and stare at the square pattern on the carpet beneath my feet. I’m dizzy and disorientated. I stay there for a while longer with my eyes firmly on the dirty treasons. He kisses her and lifts her thigh up to wrap around his, a move he always pulls on me.
Does he like to do her from behind, too?
That last thought snaps something deep inside. I don’t remember getting over to them, but I push him in the back as he pins her to the wall, he falls forward and then looks around, his expression drops in horror. Before I know what I’m doing, I’ve punched him in the face.
Melissa’s hands fly to her mouth. “Oh my God!” she gasps. “T-this isn’t what it looks like,” she stammers.
“You slut!” I scream, unable to control myself. I grab a drink from a man walking past and throw it in her face, following it up with a hard slap across her cheek. She staggers back in shock, her hand flying up to her smarting face.
“Roshelle,” Todd cries as he grabs my arm to try and control me. “Calm down.” He pulls me away from Melissa, clearly scared that I am going to hit her again.
“I will not fucking calm down.” I push out as the tears fall. I turn to him and a myriad of emotions fill me, but it is his betrayal that steals my voice. I have so many things I want to say, so many things that have escaped my brain. My eyes search his and he tries to grab my hand.
“Don’t touch me!” I yell as I whip my hand away from him. “Never again.”
I turn to Melissa. “Get your things and get out of my house.” I sneer.
“Roshelle,” she whispers. “I’m so sorry.” She shakes her head in disbelief. Suddenly the walls start closing in, and I know I have got to get out of here.
I have got to get away from this hurt.
I see an exit sign and make a beeline for it without looking back. I push out into the cold night air, the door slamming behind me.
“Shut the fuck up before I blow your fucking head off!” a man’s voice yells.