She toyed with the soft hair at his nape, twirling the silky black strands around her finger, wondering if it was bad that she felt just as wrapped around his finger. “Will you take me home now, Dirk?”
He placed his thumb beneath her chin, lifted her face. “I want to leave this monstrosity more than I can say, but are you sure?”
Concern flickered that he was calling what she’d thought a lovely Christmas party a monstrosity, but hormones ruled. That possessive look had her glutes tightening.
“Yes.” She was sure she wanted to give him…everything. More. Needed to give him everything and more.
What the hell was he doing? Dirk wondered for the hundredth time that week.
Little Miss Merry Christmas was getting to him. And not just a little.
He’d been right when he’d told Abby she was beautiful earlier. She was. Absolutely stunning in her party dress.
But not as stunning as she’d been in nothing at all.
Dirk had been focusing on Abby to get through the party, had hung around the golf conversation just because it had been one of the few conversations going that had had nothing to do with the holidays.
Now, if he wanted to get out of the party without embarrassing himself, he had to keep his mind off Abby, off that particular morning, off how he’d lost himself in her body, how he’d felt whole inside for the first time in years. Even now, with her smiling up at him, he could lose himself in everything she was and almost forget the ever-present ache inside him at this time of year.
Her big hazel eyes were striking even without makeup accentuating them. Tonight they looked huge, like luminous stars guiding him to her. Her silky brown hair had been pulled up, but rather than the tighter style she wore for work, lots of strands hung loose, curling in loose tendrils. She wore a bright red dress that demanded attention and had captivated his from the moment she’d opened her front door, smiling at him as if he really was Santa come to fulfill her heart’s every desire.
And those shoes.
He didn’t know how she walked in the spindly red heels, how any woman walked in heels, but he appreciated how they pumped out Abby’s calves, accented the toned lines of her legs. How they made his gaze want to keep traveling up those long lines, to unveil where they met, where he wanted to be. Oh, Abby.
Since his wife’s death, he hadn’t been a saint. He’d tried to ease the ache inside of him, only to realize he wasn’t dating material any more.
But he’d never been as attracted to anyone as he was to Abby.
He knew better than to get involved, knew there could never be a relationship between them. Not one that would go anywhere. He’d suck the goodness right out of her life, weigh her down with his heavy heart. She was right to question him. Given the chance, he would break her heart.
Yet, he’d slept with her, figuratively and literally, after the first night they’d worked together. Sure, he’d backed off after that morning, but only because of how she’d looked at him with hope of a happy-ever-after. That look had had sweat prickling his skin and his heart fluttering in a panicked rhythm. Otherwise he’d have been burning up her sheets for the past two months.
He’d gotten out of her house stat and promised himself he’d keep his distance. So why had he agreed to be her Santa? Why had he asked her to come to this party with him? Sure, the administrator had questioned why he hadn’t been going, but the guy would have gotten over it if he hadn’t attended.
“Dirk?” Abby prompted when he failed to respond to her gutsy invitation to take her home.
He stared down into her blue-green eyes with their golden flecks, his hands around her waist, holding her to him while Christmas music played around them.
She was sweet and wonderful and giving. The more time he spent with her, the more he craved, the more he knew he should stay away. She believed in goodness and in the magic of Christmas. She gave of herself without asking for anything in return. Hadn’t he just told her he didn’t do relationships? Yet here she was, willing to give what he wanted. The truth was, he didn’t want to go home alone, didn’t want to face the demons of being at this party, just being alive during the holiday season, dredged up from his past, not when being with Abby made him feel better, less alone. She made him forget everything but her.
Just as on the morning they’d fallen into bed together, words weren’t needed.
He was going to take all she’d give, knowing he had nothing to give in return and never would.
Bah, humbug. He really was a Scrooge.
CHAPTER FIVE
STANDING on her front porch, Abby fumbled twice before inserting the key into her door lock. Her hands shook like crazy.
She was crazy.
Hadn’t Dirk told her he didn’t do relationships? So why had they rushed from the Christmas party like teenagers? She laughed nervously. God, she felt like a teen on her way to a heated make-out session.
“Let me,” he interrupted when, although she’d gotten the key into the lock, the release hadn’t caught properly.
The lock clicked and Abby pushed the door open, practically falling into her foyer and dragging Dirk with her. He pushed the door closed with a resounding snap. The sound echoed through the darkness broken only by her Christmas lights, which cast a magical aura over the foyer and living room thanks to the timers she kept them on.