Sizzling Nights with Dr. Off-Limits
Page 13
He needed to stick with the program of how he was supposed to behave.
Instead, he played with the little girl while her mother watched them as if he were a superhero. If Lucas cured Cassie with minimal negative effects of removing the tumor, she supposed Mrs. Bellows would find her views justified.
Emily knew better. He wasn’t a superhero, he was...
She stopped.
He was an ex-husband who was apparently a phenomenal pediatric neurosurgeon, and perhaps even a nice guy to his patients if the vision before her could be believed.
Which she still didn’t quite buy.
But Lucas was right about one thing.
If she was going to stay at Children’s, she had to let go of the personal. She couldn’t let patients like Cassie and her parents pick up on her animosity toward Lucas.
What if she caused them to doubt him? What if her feelings toward him somehow influenced a patient in a negative way and delayed or prevented needed care?
She’d told him she was a professional. She was. But even professionals could have broken hearts blinding them from time to time.
She couldn’t allow her personal biases about Lucas to bleed over to her patient care in any way. Not and remain proud of the type of nurse she was.
She’d not seen him since Saturday night at the fund-raiser. She’d managed to slip back into the ballroom and convince Richard she’d developed a headache and would like to go home. He’d looked relieved.
The headache had served as reason to send him home, as well. That hadn’t left him looking relieved. Quite the opposite.
He’d acted as if he suddenly wanted to stake his claim.
Perhaps she should have let him stay.
She cared about him, had been thinking they’d have a nice life together. He never made her cry.
But that night she hadn’t even been able to tolerate the idea of Richard kissing her. Nor had she been able to stomach the idea of him kissing her since.
She wasn’t sure she’d ever want him to again, because just-okay-ever-after might not be good enough, after all.
Darn Lucas and the turmoil he’d caused. Saturday night and last night she’d dreamed about him, dreamed about the past. Not the tears or fights, but about the one part of their relationship that had been magical.
Sex.
She’d had no previous experience and sex had never been as mind-blowing since. How good things had been between them could only be credited to his skills. He’d made her feel amazing, loved, completely over the moon and satiated.
One touch of his hand had made her squirm with desire. One kiss from his lips had made her need him with a ferocity that had never failed to surprise her. One time with him and she’d been hooked like an addict with a potent new fix.
He’d been her drug.
Only, not long after their marriage, he’d bored of sex with her. Had he actually cheated on her?
She didn’t think so.
Despite their flawed marriage, she didn’t think he’d taken their vows that lightly. He’d told her to leave before he’d gone that far. Maybe she was being naive, but she truly didn’t think he had.
In the days since their divorce, she didn’t fool herself that he’d been abstinent. He’d enjoyed sex too much for that.
Darn him that just seeing him sitting and playing with a child had somehow morphed into thinking about sex. She wouldn’t be having sex with Lucas. Not ever again.
Which was a shame in some ways, because he’d certainly made her feel things physically she’d not felt since. Richard really wasn’t the guy for her. She needed to look for someone else, someone who wanted the same things out of life that she did, but was also good at sex.
Did such a mythical creature exist? So far her experience had been one or the other, but never the twain had met. She’d thought so with Lucas, but everything had fallen apart and left her devastated. So much for young love.