Now he didn’t say anything. Not a word.
Standing with only a couple of feet between them, he just looked at her. Really, really looked at her.
Her whole body trembled and she knew something monumental was about to happen. She could see it in his eyes. Could feel it in the way his body called to hers.
After weeks of skimming the surface, of letting her pretend she was off the hook and that he’d go along with their truce and ignore the underlying currents, Cole wasn’t planning to play nice.
“I’m sorry, Amelia.”
She bit the inside of her lower lip, wishing he hadn’t broken the silence, not with those words, words that penetrated deeper than any missile.
“What for? You were great today.” Even as she said the words, she knew he wasn’t talking about today. She knew exactly what he was talking about and she didn’t want to discuss the past, wanted to keep her tone light and easygoing.
But Cole had obviously reached a breaking point.
“For kissing you, for leaving, for coming to your dorm that night, for hurting you and your family, for not being able to stay away from you even though it’s what you said you wanted.” He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry for every mistake I’ve made.”
No, she didn’t want to hear his apology, didn’t want to feel the forgiveness welling in her heart.
Stocktons didn’t forgive, they got even.
Yet that didn’t feel right either.
“Why did you come?” she asked, needing to know what had driven him to show up at her dorm that crazy night so long ago when he’d obviously had no problems leaving her waiting on the night of his rehearsal. “Surely you didn’t believe I’d welcome you? Not after what happened?”
“I couldn’t not come.” Stepping even closer, he grazed his knuckles across her cheek as if he also couldn’t not touch her. “I tried to stay away, because I knew you wouldn’t forgive me. That was a given.” His fingers paused, tensing against her skin. “How could you? But I couldn’t stay away.”
Amelia fought leaning into his touch, fought the maelstrom of emotions swirling within her. She held his gaze, thinking him more dangerous to her well-being than any mission she might ever undertake. “Because?”
Of Clara? she wanted to ask, but couldn’t. When he looked at her as if he wanted her so badly, surely he wasn’t thinking of her sister?
“You were all I could think about, that I’d asked you to wait for me.” His palm cupped her face, his gaze bore into hers. “You’re still all I think about.”
Bells blared in her head, warning danger, danger. But he hadn’t said Clara, he’d said you, as in her. Not her sister. Her. Amelia.
Even as giddiness bubbled inside her, she had to stop him. Whether he was using her or not was irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. Cole had taken the cowardly way out, walking away. She could never respect that.
“Cole, don’t do this.”
Please don’t do this.
But he didn’t move away, only caressed her cheek as if she was the most precious thing he’d ever touched. “This? Is this what you don’t want me to do? I can’t deny it anymore, Amelia. I want to touch you. I’ve always wanted to touch you. You felt the heat between us as surely as I did.”
“Don’t say these things.” Don’t touch me. I can’t think when you do.
“Why not?” His thumb brushed back and forth in a slow stroke across her tingling flesh, leaving a trail of fire that burned clear to her core. “They’re true. I’ve never stopped thinking about you, wanting you. The moment I saw you again, I knew I was right to come here.”
The blaring bells cleared enough for a new warning to pop into her head, one that told her she hadn’t given Cole nearly enough credit for being the master strategist he so obviously was. She felt sucker punched.
“You being assigned on this ship, my ship, that wasn’t a coincidence, was it?” If she hadn’t been sure before, the truth shone in his eyes as clear as day, as clear as the message she was a fool was stamped on hers. “You purposely got yourself assigned to my ship.”
Anger heightened her pitch.
He winced. “It’s not like that.”
“It’s exactly like that. Unless you’re denying you arranged this?” She spread out her arm to indicate his being in her sick ward.
“I’m not denying anything.”