He shook his head. “You misunderstood, Blair. Making love to you could never be cheap sex.”
Only it had been. With Chris. And that night with Oz. Afterward, he’d left her feeling cheap. Feeling that once again, she’d let her heart put her in a humiliating place, a place that would leave her raw and aching yet again.
“None of this matters.” She just wanted away from him. Far away. Somewhere she wouldn’t have to be constantly confronted by what she’d foolishly wanted. “So what, we had sex? It’s not like either of us expected anything more.”
“I expected more, Blair. Lots more.”
He’d wanted to keep having sex with her? Okay, so that soothed her hurt ego a little, but she couldn’t handle an affair. Not with Oz. She cared too much for him. Addy cared too much for him. The best thing she could do was put as much distance between them as possible so when he left they wouldn’t be devastated any more than they already would be.
“I don’t want more.” She wanted everything. All the things Oz would never give her. All the things she’d dreamed of prior to Chris breaking her heart. She wanted a happily-ever-after of her own. One where she loved and was loved. One where she had someone to share her life with. One where Addy had a father who cherished her. One where Blair had someone to share a pregnancy with, to have him caress her belly and love the growing life inside as much as she did. She wanted all that and more from Oz.
He wouldn’t give her more. She wouldn’t settle for less.
“The night we made love was the best night of my life, Blair.” His words teased, made hope surge inside her. “I didn’t want that night to end. I still don’t. I want you in my life. I want to be a part of Addy’s life.”
Did he have any idea how difficult he was making this? It would be so easy just to say yes. To let Oz carry her upstairs and make love to her again and again. But then what? He’d leave and she’d be left to pick up the pieces of her and Addy’s broken hearts. No, she wouldn’t do it.
She’d focus on what had happened with Chris, on the horrible pain she’d felt, anything to protect her from allowing Oz to do the same.
Oz raked his fingers through his hair. This wasn’t going as well as he’d hoped. Hell, when he’d followed Blair into the kitchen, he hadn’t had a plan. He’d just known that he’d been ignored long enough, that he wanted her in his life. All day, he’d been trying to figure out how he felt about Blair, what exactly it was he wanted from her.
A few cold, hard facts hit him. The main one being that he missed her. Her smile. The way her eyes sparkled like big green jewels. The expression she wore when deep in concentration. The feel of her lips against his. The taste of those lips. God, he missed how she tasted.
He reached for her. “I want you in my life. Quit shutting me out.”
She shook her head in denial, backing away from him. “You took Addy out in a sailboat. A sailboat.” She practically choked on the word. Her eyes searched his. “How could you?”
“I didn’t know about Chris, Blair. But even if I had, I might still have taken her.” The truth hit him, hard. Why hadn’t he realized before? Probably because he’d been gutted by Dr T’s collapse, gutted by Blair’s refusal to have anything to do with him. “This isn’t about my taking Addy out in the boat, is it?”
Her gaze narrowed. “What do you mean? Of course it’s about you taking my daughter out to sea without my permission.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“I don’t care if you believe me or not.” She rolled her eyes, snorted, turned to remove the whistling teapot from the stove. Ignoring him, she dropped a couple of tea bags into the boiling water. “Go away, Oz. I have nothing to say to you.”
She wasn’t going to make this easy. Had he really expected her to? Was he laying everything on the line for nothing? Yet he had to tell her, had to know.
“Fine, then listen to me.” He held up his finger, shushing her when she started to interrupt him. He’d been cut off by her one time too many over the past two weeks. Tonight, she was going to hear him out. “For the first time in my life, I want a relationship. With you. I understand you were hurt by what happened with Chris, but I’m not him.” Did she have any idea how difficult this was for him? How it went against everything within him to make himself so vulnerable to her whims? “But we can’t have a relationship without trust.”
She opened her mouth again, but he rushed on. “You have to decide, Blair. Do you trust me? Do you really trust me and want to be a part of my life?”
CHAPTER TEN
THE following night, Blair sat in her car in the hotel parking garage. She closed her eyes.
She didn’t want to go inside. Once she went into the hotel, the evening’s events would move forward without her having any real control.
For so many reasons, she’d rather go home, to the safety of the nice little cocoon she’d made for herself over the past two weeks.
For the past six years.
From the passenger seat, Reesee patted Blair’s arm. “No worries. You look great, sis.”
“Like a princess,” Addy piped up from the back.
Taking a deep breath, Blair nodded. “Thanks to you two.”
She touched one of the rhinestone studded combs that Reesee had pulled her hair back with. When Reesee had asked what Blair planned to wear to the fund-raiser, her sister had thrown a fit and taken Blair shopping for a new dress, heels and handbag. She just hadn’t had time for shopping. Not with