“Hey, Uncle Lo,” I say in greeting as we pass. “Merry Christmas.”
He nods stiffly, cheekbones sharpened. “Merry Christmas, Sulli.” He tries to force a smile, but the entire act looks painful on his face. Once he sees his daughter, he softens a little. “Luna, you two be careful on the ice. We don’t need any Christmas calamities, alright? The Avengers aren’t phone-able out here.”
Luna smiles. “Uh-huh, no accidents, Dad.” Her breath smokes the air. “I’m not planning on ruining Xander’s birthday.”
Her younger brother turns seventeen today. All of our siblings are growing up so fucking fast.
We are too.
I chime in, “We’re always careful Uncle Lo.”
He cringes into a tiny wince like that’s un-fucking-true. Like I’m bathing in pure, toxic risk these cold winter days. He opens his mouth to speak, but I guess he thinks better of responding. And Uncle Lo just leaves for the house.
It stings.
I try to fortify iron walls, but a pressure still weighs heavy on me.
Luna follows close behind me and gives me big wide eyes as soon as her dad is gone. “Jeez, I’ve never seen my dad that frosty.” She fixes her beanie, which is actually a full-on face ski mask that resembles an alien head. Bright neon-green and all, but she folds the fabric up like a regular ole beanie.
“He’s been the same way to Akara and Banks,” I say with a lump in my throat. We reach the wooden dock, covered in soft white powder. “I thought he’d be a little warmer, but it’s been five days.”
And it’s Christmas. If the holiday spirit couldn’t warm Uncle Lo to my relationship, then nothing during this trip will.
Luna shrugs. “He’s a Slytherin.” She says his Hogwarts House like it explains everything.
Stop expecting everyone who disagrees to come around. Disappointment and hurt aren’t feelings I wanted to attach to me this morning. I glance back at the lake house, remembering how happy Akara and Banks made me feel when I woke up in their arms.
I always thought the lake house is the refuge of my life, but I’m starting to feel like they’re my greatest safe haven.
Fucking ironic, considering everyone else believes they’re the biggest danger and the greatest threat to my life.
Luna and I sink down on the snow and start putting on our skates. I untie knotted laces. “At least my dad is talking to Banks and Akara now.”
Albeit he’s not very fucking nice. My dad curses out my boyfriends and tells one to go away if they’re in the same room together. I swear my dad is trying to manifest a break-up.
I try not to picture losing Banks or Akara. A sharp pain stabs into me.
Luna kicks off her boot and fits her foot in a skate. “That’s the important thing, for sure. My dad’s opinion on your love life shouldn’t matter at all.”
I tie the laces on my skate and glance at Luna. “His opinion shouldn’t matter for your love life either.”
She frowns more. “I just don’t like being the fuck-up in my family…getting their praise just feels better.”
“I get that,” I mutter, knowing I’ve been hoping for my dad’s approval when I shouldn’t need validation from anyone. “And just so you know, you’re not a fuck-up, Luna.”
She shrugs. “I don’t always make the best choices.”
I think about me and the spiked hot cocoas at the Winter Fest, plus my talk with Banks and Akara about alcohol. “Me either,” I say softly and mull this over. “I have a theory,” I tell Luna, “that maybe this is just part of getting older. We’re not supposed to always make the best choices, but we’re doing the best we can.”
“If getting older means making a few bad choices, then I’m good with that.” Luna laces her second skate. “Aunt Rose and Uncle Connor didn’t seem to be any different around you.”
“They weren’t,” I say into a smile. “Jane said her parents were cool with me having two boyfriends. They’re more worried about the leaks.”
The gossip site has been inactive since we left for the lake house. Which has raised some suspicions, but Akara said the surveillance team found zero bugs again.
Not even in the library.
If the mole thinks my roommates and I will start cannibalizing each other with accusations and distrust, they’ve miscalculated our allegiance to each other. None of us are pointing fingers.
Luna knots her laces. “My mom is also very much on your side. Her Christmas present to you is kinda like…” her face lights up. “Well, I can’t say exactly, but it’s definitely pro-Kitsulletti.”
Kitsulletti.
I breathe in the sound. That’s the first time I’ve heard that ship name out loud. My spirits lift, floating on the clouds. The sun begins to peek over the rolling hills of the Smoky Mountains. My face hurts from smiling. “Your mom is a fucking goddess.”
“So is yours,” Luna sing-songs cutely, her cheeks rosy from the cold.