Thea couldn’t help but begin to believe him as she considered the man in the chair opposite her. Sitting back comfortably, his hands resting together, his eyes meeting hers easily, he was a far cry from the man of several months ago who had sat ramrod-straight, his fists clenching and unclenching on his knees, refusing to meet her eye but staring fixedly out of the window as each word was wrenched from him.
‘So you’ve really left?’
‘I’ve really left,’ he confirmed. ‘I’ve given the Army twelve years of my life. I’ve served with honour and I’ve loved almost every minute. But now it’s time for a new chapter in my life. A chapter that includes you and hopefully our children.’
‘I’d like that too...’ Thea bit her lip.
He saw she still wasn’t sure about him, and the realisation felt like a punch in the guts. He focused on the hope flickering in her eyes.
‘But you still don’t believe me?’
He felt as if it was all sliding away, and he was frantically grasping at the remnants of what might have been.
‘I believe that you’re sincere, and that you’ve turned a corner. But, Ben, you don’t have to be in a war zone with the Army to find ways of risking your life. You ran towards a burning car when you were with the Air Ambulance. You crossed an avalanche-struck slope on a ski holiday.’
Ben stared at her incredulously. ‘To save lives. You and I both know that if I hadn’t that baby, and Tomas, would have been dead by the time anyone else got there. If someone’s life is in danger I have to help—that’s just who I am.’
‘I kno
w that,’ Thea assured him. ‘And I would never expect you to walk away from someone in need. But the way you do it—running blindly in, with no regard for your own safety—that scares me.’
‘Then what do you propose?’ He held his hands out desperately. He couldn’t lose her. Not now.
‘A trial period,’ she said at last. ‘For our relationship and for the Air Ambulance.’
‘What does that mean?’ Ben asked carefully.
‘At work you’re always going to be the one who risks his life for others—look at your Distinguished Service Order, look at the men you pulled to safety after that bomb blast even when you only had one arm. I’m not trying to change that. But just take a moment—one minute, thirty seconds, fifteen seconds—that’s all I ask. To talk to me, or anyone, so that I know you’ve assessed the danger. So that I know you’re taking calculated risks, not reckless ones. So that I don’t feel so helpless.’
‘I can do that,’ Ben agreed slowly.
He understood exactly where she was coming from, and he respected her strength of character. He was impetuous, she was right about that, and he needed someone who cared enough about him to pull him up over it. He knew Thea was that person.
‘And as for our relationship...’
This was the bit he really wanted to know. He had to convince Thea that she was all that mattered to him. Without her, his life was empty.
‘We spend time together,’ she said simply. ‘We get to know each other. Sometimes we do boring, mundane things, like going to the cinema, instead of you wanting me try base jumping or something equally adrenalin-fuelled.’
He nodded. He’d always used that kind of stuff as a distraction—especially around anniversaries—to avoid having to think about how he felt. But with Thea he didn’t feel he needed those safety nets any more.
‘Learning about each other...talking,’ he agreed with a grin. ‘I can do that.’
‘It doesn’t mean we can’t have fun together.’ She smiled.
‘Does this trial period include separate bedrooms?’ he asked, suddenly straight-faced. ‘Because if it does, I can tell you that’s a deal-breaker.’
‘It does not include separate rooms.’ She laughed softly.
‘OK, then.’ His gaze never left hers as he became serious again. ‘I’ll give you as long as you need. Until you know that you have nothing left to fear. I intend to put you—our family—first from now on.’
‘Then I think you’d better sign some new paperwork,’ she choked out, tears spilling over as Ben crossed the divide between them in one smooth movement and lifted her up from her chair into his arms, his mouth coming down to claim hers.
It was a kiss full of hope, full of promise, and one day soon he hoped it would turn into one free of any lingering reservations.
‘And when you finally trust me completely I promise you I’m going to carry you over that damned threshold, Mrs Abrams.’ His lips rumbled against hers as they finally came up for air.
‘I hope you can fulfil that promise, because I’d like that, Mr Abrams,’ Thea murmured. ‘I’d like that very much.’