What the hell was he thinking? She was pregnant. With his baby. And Catherine had said there could potentially be an issue. They couldn’t risk it. They couldn’t take that chance. Allowing himself to be driven by his desire, his emotion was exactly the kind of selfishness that his parents had exhibited time and again. He would not repeat their mistakes.
He would not let the fact that he shared their DNA make him like them.
‘This can’t happen,’ he growled, lifting her bodily of his lap and placing her as far across the back seat as he possibly could. Never more grateful for the privacy glass which concealed them from both the driver and the outside world.
She made a sound. It might have been a mutter of agreement but he didn’t care. He busied himself locating her clothes. Fastening his shirt.
‘That should never have started.’ He was aware that he was directing the fury he felt at himself towards Archie, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. ‘You have the baby to consider.’
What the hell was wrong with him?
‘Dr Jarvis said occasional light sex is acceptable,’ she parroted. ‘It’s not as if we’re going at it every day.’
A flush raced up her cheek as though she could scarcely believe her own audacity. It was more of a turn-on than he was prepared to admit.
‘This can never happen again.’ Determined, Kaspar cut her off. ‘This will never happen again.’
But she was becoming emboldened.
‘Really? Because it seems that the more time we spend together, the more it’s inevitable.’
For a moment she actually sounded like it wasn’t such a bad thing. And he wanted too much to believe her. If he stayed, he was sure that he’d wind up letting her talk him into things when he ought to know better.
‘Then it seems clear to me that the only solution is to spend less time together.’
‘You’re going to stay at the hospital,’ she guessed, cutting in.
‘One of us has to take responsibility for this...thing between us.’
To his shock, she swung around, her eyes flashing with a fury he hadn’t seen in her since she’d been a little kid shut out of the more daring exploits he and Robbie had egged each other onto.
‘That’s not taking responsibility, Kaspar. That’s running away. It’s not something I thought I’d ever see you do.’
* * *
It was only when the car pulled into the drive of Kaspar’s oceanside home that Archie felt she could finally breathe again, let alone speak. Ever since her uncontrolled outburst the atmosphere in the car had pulsed with barely suppressed fury, but Kaspar hadn’t uttered a word to her.
If he had, she feared she might have melted from their molten ire. The urge to run inside and bolt the door was almost overwhelming, but if she did that then Kaspar would leave. She didn’t want him to.
So instead she folded her arms across her chest and summoned one last ounce of strength.
‘Don’t go, Kaspar. Not tonight.’
For a moment she thought he was going to ignore her, but then he turned his head, his eyes pinning her to the seat.
‘I have to.’
‘Please.’ She couldn’t say what passed between them, or what it meant, but she knew instinctively that he was going to stay. ‘Take me for a walk along the beach?’
* * *
Carefully, with his arm under her elbow, she made her way down the hillside to the beach, slipping her sandals off and spreading her toes in the soft sand. She tilted her face towards the warm setting sun and realised that in spite of everything she wasn’t unhappy, or lonely, or wishing she’d never got on that damned plane to America.
To Kaspar.
Because if she hadn’t got on that plane then she wouldn’t be here now, walking along the beach and realising that even if he never loved her the way she wanted him to, he would always love their child. Always fight for him or her.
‘Why are you so determined to fight your feelings for me, Kaspar? Whatever they