Tough Cookies (New Year New Me 1)

“I can see where Clem gets her cuteness.”

“Now I’m starting to see that charm Win talked about.”

“Funny. Tell me about him.” I wrap my arm around her shoulders, and she snuggles into me.

“For a long time, he was my everything. We started dating at the end of freshman year, and it went from there. He could do no wrong in my eyes. He was my first everything from dating to sex. I never saw the need to look elsewhere. When we were younger, he felt protective. I didn’t realize his actions were more about control and snobbery. He wasn’t trying to keep me safe. He was trying to keep me the way he wanted. By the time I saw it, we were already years deep into our marriage and starting a family. I thought I could live with it. No,” she sighs, “I would’ve.”

“Why?” I whisper, kissing her temple.

“Because I didn’t know anything else, and I wanted Clem to have both parents.” She inhales shakily. “And then I caught him with her, in our own house.” Her voice trembles. “I knew we weren’t happy like we should’ve been, but I trusted him.”

“I’m sorry he hurt you. I know I can tell you I’d never hurt you that way, but words without proof are pointless. We can go as slowly as you need, but I’m serious about you.”

“Your life isn’t what I want.” She moves away.

I tighten my hold, pressing her against me as I cup her chin. “Just because I’m in front of the camera doesn’t mean you have to be.”

“What?” The genuine look of confusion on her face makes me want to laugh.

“This is my dream. I don’t expect it to be yours. You can support me without being directly involved. I won’t lie about dating you, because you deserve better than that, but I can respect your privacy.” She blinks. My heart stutters in my chest. “Did I assume too much?”

“Are you real?” She cups my face.

“Flaws and all.” I lean down and kiss her gently, tasting the pepperoni’s spice and the sweetness from the cola. She yawns. We break apart laugh. “That’s my cue. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

She clutches my shirt. “Text me, so I know you made it home.”

“Yeah.” Standing from the couch, I feel my world shift. My show is on the rise, and so is my love life. I run my thumb over her cheekbone. “Sleep well.” Bending, I kiss her forehead. “I’ll lock up behind myself. Make sure you set the alarm before you go to sleep.”

“I will. Night, Anders.”

For the first time, I feel one-hundred percent sure that leaving R.A.A. was the right choice at the right time.

THE CEASELESS RINGING of the phone drags me from the bed. I slap at the nightstand, searching for the offending electronic. Pulling it into my bundle of comforter and sheets, I press it to my ears.

“Hello?” I croak.

“I can’t believe you did this. I trusted you.”

“Tilly?” I grumble.

“Don’t you dare call me that! You knew what I went through, and you screwed me over, just like he did. God. Did he put you up to this?”

“I don’t even know what you’re talking about, sweetheart. You have to calm down.”

“Oh, fuck you. It’s all over the internet. You promised me you wouldn’t—” Her voice breaks.

“I’m coming over.”

“Don’t bother.” The silence that comes from dead air when someone hangs up blares in my ear. Sitting up in bed, I shove the covers off my lap and rub my face. It’s like I woke up in the Twilight Zone. Everything had been perfect for the past week. Today we were supposed to go to the bake sale together. I grab my wireframe glasses and turn on the lamp. Seeing her texts, I click on the link, and my stomach drops.

Cookie family? They’ve blurred Clem’s face, but there’s no mistaking it’s her in my arms. Who could’ve taken this? We’d been careful about being seen together before we were ready. This had been me carrying her from the car into the house. Who the fuck was sitting outside of her house? Does she really think I set this up? My stomach churns. I rub my eyes with the heels of my palms as I try to jump-start my brain. I’m not big enough to warrant paparazzi or reporters, so this has to be someone from her end. I picture her husband and his mantrum in the driveway. What would he gain from this, though?

I roll out of bed, pull on a clean pair of jeans and a T-shirt, quickly brush my teeth, and head over to her house. I knock, spearing my fingers through my hair.

“Go away.” Her voice is thick with tears, and it makes my heart hurt.

“You can’t think this was me, Tilly. I have nothing to gain from this.”