'Tis The Season

“I’ve been trying to get the words together in my head. Nothing sounds right.”

“So, go off the cuff and just say what’s in your heart,” Daniel suggests.

“I’m worried I’ll muck it up.”

“James, you’re one of the most sincere and frank people I know. It’s not always easy to hear the truth, but I never doubt it when it comes from you. If she’s letting you get this close to her after everything with the douchebag, it means she trusts you.” He places a hand on my shoulder. “I think you should give yourself more credit.”

“I’m nervous. I can’t remember the last time I was this twisted up over a woman. Maybe when I decided to ask Clare to marry me.” I shake my head, remembering the late-night drinking sessions where I plotted and planned with Dan and Mike there for moral support.

“You were a wreck trying to figure out where and how to ask her.”

“She’d waited so long at that point, I felt like it had to be perfect. It feels silly now considering we didn’t even make it down the aisle.”

“It doesn’t change anything about how the two of you felt.”

“This feels even more intense. We’re talking about choices that’ll impact a child.”

“Yeah. You are. Are you ready for that?”

“I love kids. You know that.”

“I do. But she won’t be yours. You’ll have to deal with her jack ass father, and—”

“I couldn’t care less about any of that, Dan. You should know me better.”

Dan holds up his hand. “I was just playing devil’s advocate. I think any kid would be lucky to have you around in whatever capacity the two of you decide. A child can’t have too much love.”

His words are a puzzle piece that clicks into place. “You’re right. I’m going to stop by tonight. Faye’s working nights, so she’ll be about ready to head in to work.”

“Go. You won’t be much use to me here anyway.” He gestures toward the door of the bar.

“Are you sure?”

“It won’t be the only time I’ve had a few drinks by myself.”

“Thanks, man. I owe you.”

“Just keep me posted?”

“You know it.” Finishing my beer, I toss a tip on the counter and rise, making my way through the crowded bar. Singing along to the music, I tap on the steering wheel as I drive the familiar path to the condo. Parking, I hurry to her front door and knock. She opens the door with a frown that turns up quickly.

“James! What are you doing here?”

I cup her face and kiss her, stepping inside and shutting the door behind us with my foot. “I am crazy about you. I like what we have, but I want more. I don’t want to keep things casual. I want everyone to know you’re mine, and I want to be yours, Faye. We can take things as slowly as you need, but I’ve been swallowing the words for too long, and it’s driving me insane. If you feel the same way, please tell me.”

“I-I didn’t dare hope,” she whispers breathlessly. “I’ve wanted more for a while now, but I didn’t want to assume, or ...” She shakes her head.

“I want to be here for you and Flora.” I place my hand over her belly.

Closing her eyes, she smiles. “I want that, too, James. But are you sure? It’s a lot.”

I silence her with my lips, staking my claim. “You are my girls now, and I’m going to be sure you’re taken care of.” Her body melts into mine.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, James.”

“I won’t.” I kiss the crown of her head and feel home for the first time in years.

“ARE YOU OKAY?” I GLANCE down at her.