Broken but Breathing (Jinx Tattoos 2)

“Do you get up and talk?” Jolene asked, leaning forward in her chair.

“No. Honestly, I usually just listen. But they don’t make you do anything you don’t feel up to.”

Jolene smiled. “I’m glad you found something that helps you.”

“Me too. It feels like a massive breakthrough.”

“So, what did you and support do?” Jolene asked.

She was fishing, but Estelle had no plans of taking the bait. She wanted to keep Snake to herself for now.

“Hung out, played pool, and shot darts.”

Jolene’s eyebrows raised. “Really?”

“Well, I get out of class at eleven. There isn’t much else to do at that time of night.”

“True. You’re awfully tight-lipped regarding the entire thing. You’re not going to give me any details?”

She shook her head and mocked buttoning her lips.

“Hmmm,” Jolene hummed.

“Enough about me. Tell me what’s going on with you,” Estelle asked, switching the spotlight.

“Running ragged. With one in middle school and the other in high school I’m constantly going back and forth. I can’t wait until Joshua gets his driver’s license this year. We’re going to get him a reasonably priced dependable car, and I’ll regain some of my sanity.”

Estelle smiled. “I know it’s crazy now, but you love it.”

Jolene sighed. “I really do. I feel like I blinked, and they grew up on me. In another year, Brenda will be in high school, and Josh will be one step closer to leaving the nest. Then what will I do?”

“Take painting classes, go to wine tastings, enjoy your husband,” Estelle said, happy to be the one reassuring her friend for once. Theirs had been a horribly lopsided relationship in the past two years.

“Todd is always so busy with work. Part of me fears what will happen when we don’t have the kids as a buffer.”

“Are you two having problems?” Estelle asked.

“No. At least that would be something. Right now, we’re two ships passing in the n

ight. I feel like the romance in our marriage is dead. It’s all duty, schedules, and realism.” She shook her head.

“Do you have date nights?” Estelle asked, vaguely recalling the tradition they used to indulge in bi-weekly.

She laughed. The bitter cackle raised Estelle’s hackles, and hurt her ears like a bad chord. It was painful to listen to.

“I can’t remember the last time we went on a date. Not a family function we’re obligated to dress up and attend, but an outing where we focus solely on one another, hold hands, and time outside of that moment ceases to exist. No. We’ve gotten so far off course, I don’t know how to get back on the right path.”

“How long have you been feeling like this?” Estelle asked, stunned by the revelation. Jolene always seemed to have everything together.

“Too long. I can’t give you a date. It’s become a recurring thought stuck on a loop in my brain. I didn’t feel comfortable talking about it before, because what does this say about me? I’m in this marriage I don’t even enjoy. That makes me a complete failure.” Her eyes glistened, and she sniffled.

“No, it doesn’t.” Estelle set her mug down on the end table and leaned over to take Jolene’s hands. “You realized you have an issue. Now it’s our job to figure out what we can do to fix this. Your kids are old enough to stay alone. Set up one day each week for you and Todd to have some alone time. You both deserve it.”

“Part of me is afraid to ask him.”

The pain in Jolene’s voice made her heartache. “Why?”

“What if he says no? What if addressing the elephant in the room brings me worse news?”