I want to scratch my brother’s eyes out. If he’d shown up a few minutes later, Shayne would’ve heard all of this from me first. Now I look like a child caught with their hand in a cookie jar.
“Please just go home, Ellis. You’ve done enough damage for one night. You’re going to do what you want with the information, and I’m finished talking.”
He peers at me with a wounded expression as he walks out the way he came, shaking his head. Closing the door, I lean back against it to face a stern faced Shayne.
“Were you really going to tell me about branching out?”
“Yes. I wasn’t trying to keep it from you. I’ve just been swamped, and I knew this wasn’t a sure bet. This loan may not be granted at all, and it’ll be back to square one.”
“You want to leave?”
I bite the inside of my cheek. Is he going to be upset? “Yes.”
“I’m not your family. I don’t want to hold you back, and I know you aren’t happy or where you want to be in life. What bothers me is that you kept it to yourself. I don’t want to hear things from your brother.”
“While I get that, this all went into motion before we were us.”
“Are more skeletons going to jump out of your closet, Xia?” he asks snarkily.
“Are you seriously going to talk to me about keeping things to myself? Other than your sexual history and a small bit of your family history, I’m still completely in the dark. Who here has something to hide?”
“You aren’t turning this around on me.” He points his finger at me.
“No, I’m speaking the truth.” I say coolly.
He frowns. “Right. Tell me this … what happens if you get the loan?”
“I start up my own truck.” I cross my arms over my chest.
“And what will that mean for us?” He tilts his head, studying me with the piercing gaze that seemed to see everything.
“Nothing, unless you let it. You’re nearly ready to train others. It might delay things with Smoke II, but I can’t worry about them anymore. It’s my time.” Is this where the other shoe drops and I see his true colors? If he’d begrudge me following my dreams, this can’t work.
“I don’t like secrets.”
“There was nothing to tell. Do you plan on becoming an open book?”
He clenches his jaw. “You’ve never asked me something I didn’t answer.”
“Do you think I want to pry everything out of you? Your mannerisms scream off limits every time you delve into anything deeper than your immediate family. Meanwhile, my family dysfunction is on display for you daily. Have you ever thought about that?” I toss my hands up in the air.
“No, I hadn’t,” he mumbles.
“We both have a lot left to learn about each other. We’ve been in the honeymoon phase until now. It couldn’t last forever.”
“Tomorrow everything will be out in the open. You ready for that?” he asks.
“Does it matter if I was or not? It’s done.”
“Are you ashamed of me?”
“Is there a reason I should be?” I counter.
“I’ve never been the type of man woman are dying to bring home.” His words have a hidden meaning I’m too exhausted to further examine.
“There’s a world full of things to explor
e there. Just not tonight.” I pinch the bridge of my nose as a headache dances on the edges of my conscious. Fights are inevitable, but the weakness I see in our relationship is disheartening. I’ve been walking around on a cloud, and now my eyes are open. “Are you staying or leaving?”