“Because If I don’t prepare myself and it happens…” He trails off and looks out the window over my shoulder.
“And if it doesn’t? I’m not going to let fear keep me from seeing this baby be born. So you need to get ready for the arrival. No more talk about not having the bean, you understand?” I point my finger at him.
“Even knowing this you’d have my baby?” he rasps.
“I am having your child.”
He runs a hand through his hair and gives a half laugh. “Yeah, I guess you are.”
I set aside my hurt from before and run my hands through his silken hair. It’s rare I see it without product. “Are you with me on this? Cause I kind of need your help.”
He rests his forehead against mine. “I’m with you. I’m a stubborn, cranky bastard. I’ll piss you off and make mistakes, but I’ll never leave you. Don’t give up on me, girl.
I promise you I’ll get it all figured out.”
“You know I’m going to call you on your bullshit?” I ask tentatively.
“I’m counting on it.”
I grip his cut. “You know I’m still pissed at you, right?”
“Never again,” he says solemnly.
“You’ll never let some slut give you head, or you won’t leave a trail of bread crumbs for me to follow.”
“You made it clear how you felt. I can use my hand and your dirty little mouth in my ear.”
I can’t fight back the smile that spreads across my lips. “Deal.”
“So, I’m forgiven?”
“Yes, but it’s going to take me a while to trust you again, and really forget.”
“Fair enough. How are you feeling?”
“Sick to my stomach off and on, hungry, and emotional as hell which I’m not used to.”
“It’s kind of funny seeing the cool and calm Ruthie Gregg get a little unraveled.”
“That’s because you’re an asshole.”
“Yeah, but I’m your asshole, right?”
“Looks like it,” I say with a roll of my eyes. We’re not okay by any means, but this is a starting point. I want to ask him more about his parents, but I don’t want to push my luck. We’ve got less than nine months to get our shit where it needs to be. I’m wary and my guard is up. Nothing about this transitional period will be easy. Of course, nothing worth having ever is.
***
“I need to get going. I have to start my shift at the grill. I’m closing tonight.”
I’m relieved. His presence is suffocating. His scent lulls me into a false sense of security and his warmth makes me want to press my body against his. I’m not into giving mixed messages. So I’ve forced myself to remain in my corner of the love seat. “All right. I’ll talk to you tomorrow after I get off work and make an appointment.”
He stands and offers his hand pulling me to my feet. “Yeah, I want to talk to you about that.” He scratches the back of his head. “I don’t want you here by yourself.”
“Are you serious? I can’t be that far along yet.”
“Yet, you’re already sick,” he says.
“It’s called morning sickness. No one dies from it.”