“Because my dad bailed. He chose drugs, alcohol, cheap bitches and infamy over his family. What did that say about me? If the first man in my life couldn’t hang around. Why would anyone else want to?”
“That’s bullshit. It was his loss.”
“Exactly. Eventually, I came to accept that as truth. I’m still bitter as hell about the choices he made in life and the way they affected me.”
“That’s understandable,” he says.
His attempt to pacify me gives me the courage to continue. I know his parents are a touchy topic, but this is a necessary conversation. “As is your situation. That’s heavy shit for anyone to deal with. You’re not exempt because of who you are and the M.C. you belong to. If I didn’t think you were the one for me, I wouldn’t be here. We have rivers of crap to wade through before we can get there. I could pretty up the truth, but that’s not the way either of us operates.” I move my head forward and brush his lips. “Give us a real chance, heal these open wounds before they fester and poison us all.”
“I don’t know how.”
“See someone. If not for yourself, then for this little one in my belly.” I rest a hand on my stomach.
He closes his eyes and rests his forehead against mine.
; I’m so close to a breakthrough with him. His phone rings.
“Ignore it.”
“I can’t, you know that.”
I release a heavy sigh as I let go of his wrists and lean back against my pillows.
“Hello. Yes. Alright man, I’m on my way in.” He hangs up. “I gotta go, babe.”
I sigh. “Where?”
“We had a no call no show at the Bar and Grill and Shadow has already worked two closings in a row.”
I nod my head. “Go.”
“We’ll talk about this more later, okay?”
“Yeah.”
He delivers a kiss that steals my breath away. “If I didn’t want this to work I wouldn’t be here. Don’t throw in the towel on me, girl.”
“We have until the baby is born to get this right. Tick tock.”
“Using my own words against me? You’re lucky I have to leave right now.”
My body tingles with anticipation. I like the power play. Pushing his buttons yields results that cause fireworks. But the unhealthy back and forth needs to stop. I wink.
“If you need anything call me or Shadow and Blue.”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Smart ass,” he says as he heads out of my room for the door.
I’m a hypocrite telling him to get help when I’m dodging my own mother. I have things to put right. When the front door closes and his bike rumbles to life, I grab my phone and bite the bullet.
“Ruthie?”
“Yeah, Mom.”
“Oh, thank God. I was worried. I was giving you a few more days before I called the police. I thought maybe that that man had done something to you.”