I open my mouth, and the lie dies on my tongue. I don’t know how to break it to her gently, so I unwind my head scarf.
“Oh my God, what happened to all your beautiful hair, baby?”
“I have Alopecia, Mama.” I can’t hold back the tears as she moves over to hug me and I break in front of the one person who’s always been my rock.
“It’s going to be okay, baby. We’ll get through this the same way we always have, together. Hair isn’t everything.”
Her words alleviate my worst fears. I was worried she’d be embarrassed or ashamed of me.
“I feel so ugly, Mama.”
“Oh no, my baby is beautiful inside and out. Nothing will change that.” Her words are a soothing salve to my stinging and battered pride and sense of self. Right or wrong, a woman’s femininity is so entwined with her appearance, especially her hair. I’m battling with preconceived notions I hadn’t realized I subscribed to until this happened. It’s a rocky road, but now that I have my number one ally on my side it feels so much more bearable.
***
Edgar
I knock on the door and smile as Addler’s wife, Abby, answers.
“Hey, Edgar.”
“Hi, thanks for having me.” I step in and hug her.
“Someone has been waiting for you to get her all afternoon,” she says.
I grin. “Where’s my goddaughter at?” I ask loudly.
The sound of giggles comes from the living room. I follow them. “Where could she be?” I ask as I slowly turn around, spotting a suspicious lump on the couch beneath a dark pink blanket.
“Maybe she’s in the fireplace,” I say, walking away from the couch. Her laughter grows louder.
“No, not there. Maybe she’s under the table. Hmm, nope.” I tap my chin.
Addie tosses off the blanket. “I’m here, Uncle Edgar.”
“Oh, there she is.” She hops off the couch and I kneel to catch her in my arms. Her soft blonde curls tickle my nose. I inhale her sweet scent as she cuddles into me.
“I missed you, Uncle Edgar.”
“I missed you, too, baby doll.”
“Can you play dolls with me until dinner?” she asks.
“Sure, if that’s okay with your mommy and daddy.” I glance over at Abby and Addler who nod.
“It’ll give me time to finish dinner,” Addler replies.
“Yay. I got some new ones,” Addy says.
“Duty calls, brother,” I state, leaving him to man the grill solo.
She takes me to the playroom where I’m promptly handed a brunette Barbie. “This is Hayley. You can play with her.”
“Okay.” I take my voice up an octave. “What are we going to do today, Addie?”
She laughs. “We’re going swimming in our pool.”
I make the doll walk over to the pool set up behind the blue roof topped, two-story dream house.