Peyton’s eyes were wide, her posture a little too stiff. I couldn’t tell if she was shocked or pissed off. I tore my eyes off of her and went back to monitoring the control panel. I didn’t care either way. As soon as we landed, I would march into Barney Lamont’s office and demand that I be reassigned a co-pilot.
“What crawled up your ass and died?” Peyton sneered; her voice icy.
My jaw went tight but I didn’t justify her barb with a response.
“Seriously, Jack, what the hell is the matter with you? Last night you were flirting and buying me drinks and then all of a sudden, it was like a light went off and you bolted. You bipolar or something? I mean that is some serious Dr. Jekyll shit!”
The anger rose in my belly—red and fire hot. But when it hit the top, it fizzled and vanished, leaving me drained and tired all over again. I glanced at Peyton out of the corner of my eye. She was eying me with curiosity and maybe an edge of fear.
“It’s not you,” I finally said. “It’s a long story. Sorry I took it out on you. I’m just working through some shit.”
Peyton tilted her head. “You wanna talk about it? We got a hell of a long flight and judging by the blue sky and puffy, white clouds, it’s gonna be pretty uneventful.”
I considered her offer. She was right about the weather. Auto-pilot was going to do most of the work for the next few hours and I was struggling to stay awake. Maybe talking would help. Hell, as much as Aaron tried, he wasn’t exactly a compassionate listener. He liked to tell me what a fuckup I was and seemed to think I should race home, gather Holly into my arms, and tell her I’d been an idiot. Like that would somehow erase all the damage.
“I was engaged,” I started. The words came out like a heavy sigh. “We broke up about three months ago. I moved from California to New York to try and start over, have some adventures, and put some miles between her and me.”
“But it’s not working?”
I laughed. “Not even a little bit.”
“I’m sorry,” Peyton replied, her voice a low whisper. “I didn’t know. I wouldn’t have—”
I held up a hand. “No, please. You didn’t know.”
I dragged in another deep breath, sipped from my water bottle, and then turned toward her. “You’re a beautiful girl. And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested last night. But I’m not there yet. I don’t want to move on. Or maybe it’s just that I can’t. I’m not sure which.”
Peyton nodded thoughtfully. “I get it. I had a bad breakup a few years ago. My high school sweetheart. He was supposed to be the one. But ya know, shit happens.” She scoffed. “Anyway, after that, I swore off men for about a year.”
“What changed?”
“I don’t really know. I just woke up one day and decided I was tired of being alone and just because he’d broken my heart, it didn’t mean I couldn’t still find someone special. But as of yet, I’m still looking.” She paused and then a wicked smile flicked over her lips. “But I’m gonna make damn sure I have a good time on the way.”
I chuckled. “Aha. Sounds like a solid plan.”
“But three months is hardly anything,” she added. “It takes time. As much as it sucks to hear it, it’s true.”
I nodded, feeling my smile fade. “That’s what everyone says.”
“Do you like New York?”
I shrugged. “It’s definitely a change, but I haven’t decided if it’s right for me.”
“Well, when you’re ready, let me know and I’ll take you out and introduce you to some of the city’s single women. They’d probably have a massive catfight to get a chance with a guy like you. Most of the guys in New York City are douchebags. Fun for a night or two but that’s about it. The lovely Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda weren’t lying on Sex in the City. It’s tough!”
I laughed. “Thanks for the warning.”
Peyton smiled. “Oh, no I mean for the women. You’ll have it easy whenever you go out. I was serious when I mentioned catfights.”
“I can’t even remember the last time I went to a club,” I mused, staring out at the clouds as they passed by. “Or had a meaningless hookup.”
Peyton shrugged. “You will. When you’re ready.”
I looked over at her and smiled, reassessing my earlier plan to demand a change-up in my co-pilot rotation. “Thanks, Peyton. Sorry I was a dick last night.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m here, seriously, whenever you wanna talk.”
“I think I’ve had enough couch time today, but I’ll keep that in mind. Now, let’s just get home in one piece. Which means I’m going to need another cup of joe.”