The Senior (College Years 4)

She’s here tonight. I haven’t personally laid eyes on her, but Caleb warned me she was coming with her family and the girls. Jackson showed up unexpectedly right before the game, which made my fucking night. He’s half the reason I played so damn well. I wanted to look good for him.

And Ava’s the other half—I wanted to look good for her too.

I linger on the field for way too long, hoping for a glimpse of Ava or maybe even her father, but I don’t ever spot them. I finally give up and head for the locker room, where I’m welcomed with lots of shouting and cursing, Jackson leading the pack, the fucker. He’s grinning when I approach him, holding his hand up, which I clasp. Instead of giving him some complicated handshake we made up when we were still in high school, I yank him in for a hug, slapping him on the back.

“What did you think?” I ask after we quickly let go of each other.

“You were on fire tonight,” he says with a nod. “No wonder the NFL wants you.”

“They don’t want me,” I say, trying to brush it off. I played well for the scouts too, can’t forget about that.

Though I sort of did. Forget about them. I was too wrapped up in Jackson and Ava being here tonight and wanting to impress them.

“Don’t give me that bullshit,” Jackson says. “They want you. We should celebrate your win tonight.”

“What do you have in mind?” I ask warily. Jackson is a partier of the highest degree. The rock-star life is perfect for him.

“There’s a party happening after the game. Watson over there invited us.” He points at one of the seniors on the defensive line. The guy is as big as a house and stronger than fuck. “His girlfriend is throwing it. I guess she’s a cheerleader?”

That must’ve been the party the other girls from the cheer team invited me to. “If lots of women are there, I’m down.”

Jackson laughs. “You looking to get laid?”

“Sure. Yeah.” I shrug, hating how the thought of being with another female, that’s not Ava, doesn’t appeal to me at all. “I want to celebrate. I’ve been on the grind all season.”

“You’ve been on the grind the last three and half years,” Jackson reminds me. “When was the last time you partied?”

“A couple nights ago,” I admit. I got shit-faced drunk that night when I found out about my NFL potential. “Paid the price with a massive hangover the next day too.”

“Well, you’re not doing shit tomorrow so let’s go for it. I’m sure the girls will join us.” Jackson pauses, his expression turning worried. “Just Ellie and the rest of the girlfriends.”

“No Ava?” I decide to be the one who says her name first. I’m guessing Jackson wouldn’t mention her for fear of upsetting me.

“I don’t think so. She can go home with her mom and dad.” He laughs.

I don’t. He sho

uldn’t make fun of her, but I don’t call him out for it. Not my place anymore.

“I don’t care if she’s there.” I shrug, trying to play it off.

“You sure about that? I hear she takes the wind out of your sails,” Jackson says. “Ellie will want to bring her.”

“Ellie can do whatever she wants.” My voice is calm.

That’s my mode tonight. Calm in the face of Ava.

“All right. Cool.” Jackson nods.

“Listen, I don’t want Ava ruining my vibe, but if I avoid her, she’ll avoid me. We’ll be fine.” I grab his shoulder and give him a light shake. “I’m on top of the world right now, J. I feel fuckin’ good. I had my best game of the season, and people want to talk to me. They keep mentioning the NFL and it’s blowing my fucking mind. I just want to bask in this for a while. That’s all I’m asking for.”

“I get it,” Jackson says with a nod. “It’s your night, bro.”

“Yeah, it is, isn’t it?” I smile, but deep inside, I sort of do want to talk to Ava. Feel her out. See what she wants.

See if what she might want is…

Me.