A Very Cerberus Christmas (Cerberus MC)

I kick my jeans the rest of the way off as I reach for her, my lips meeting hers the second she stands, and I want to get lost in her. I want to forget the rest of the world if only for an hour or so, but I refuse to compromise her future, to take away her choice and complicate her life any further.

I take a step back, loving the way she reaches for me in the distance I create as I reach for my jeans and produce a condom from the pocket. She watches, her teeth digging into her delicate lower lip as I roll the barrier down my length. She put the boundary between us when she chose going to Texas over staying and having a family with me. If she hadn’t, I wouldn’t worry with the damn thing.

I try not to be too rough with that reminder in my head when I lift her from the floor. By the time I press her back to the bed, I’m mostly under control once again.

I both want and need hard and fast. I want and need soft and slow. I’m at war with the two, a battle inside. I want to beg, but I also want to punish.

Her eyes beg me, and as well as I’ve gotten to know this woman, I don’t know what she’s asking for. Does she want the punishment, or is she needing forgiveness?

I give her soft and slow because I don’t want our last memories together to leave a sour taste in her mouth. I press my lips to hers, lining my cock up at her entrance. That part of me has no doubts. It knows exactly what to do and pleasing her is its only mission. It’s doesn’t want to maim and hurt. It doesn’t want to burn the world down and leave casualties lying around. It’s only looking for pleasure. I obey him, drawing out her whimpers and gasps, smiling into her throat when her legs open further before she wraps her legs high on my hips.

My thrusts are slow and purposeful, the grind at the top for her gratification, the soft sound she makes because of it for mine. Sweat slicks our skin, sticking us to each other as we become a single entity in more ways than one.

I don’t allow myself to picture us being more than that. Letting go tonight is already going to be too hard as it is. I live in the moment, the right now, and I seize what I can from here, breathing her in, memorizing every single second.

Her orgasm takes me by surprise, the slow roll of her hips the only warning I get before her body begins to tremble and that promise she made on my fingers becomes a reality as she pulses down the length of my cock. My hips slow as I fuck her through it, moaning in her ear because, fuck, she feels so damn good.

I follow shortly after. I couldn’t hold back after that if I wanted to. Her body calls to mine like we were meant for—

No. I can’t even think thoughts like that. They’re not allowed.

The hope I had before she arrived, that idea I prayed for that she was going to tell me that she changed her mind, that she was going to choose me, died the second I opened the door and saw the look in her eyes.

She made her choice, and now I have to follow through with mine.

She clings to me a second longer when I try to pull away. I give it to her. I stay locked against her chest, kissing her tears away, not hiding the ones that fall from my own eyes.

Goodbyes fucking suck, and I know that this is going to be the last one. I’ll never do it again.

As much as I wanted to ruin her for other men, she’s done that very same fucking thing for me. No other woman would compare to her.

A chance meeting in a gas station parking lot, and Lucy Farrow changed my world forever.

Broken right to the center of me, I have to pull away.

She wastes no time climbing out of the bed, and I don’t try to stop her.

We don’t speak as she dresses, and I dispose of the condom.

Her tears are silent, much like the entire night has been other than me saying her name when she first arrived. She doesn’t apologize for the pain or her choices, and I don’t expect her to. Much like I won’t apologize for the things I said back at the clubhouse. I meant them in the moment, and I still mean them now. Robbie doesn’t deserve the blind following he’s getting, and Harley deserves better, but the decisions she makes about her son are hers.