She narrows her eyes at me, but I see she’s fighting a smile. “How’s your arm?”
“Healing. The doctor said I should be ready for training again this spring.”
“I heard from your scholarship committee this morning.”
My stomach sinks. They sent me an email earlier this week, but I ignored it. I wasn’t ready for the answer, and I’m still not ready now. But I know Principal Nolan, and there won’t be any way to get out of listening to what she’s going to say.
“They wanted me to remind you that your invitation is contingent on graduation and not on your final season of rowing. You’re still allowed in their athletic program once you’ve been cleared by their medical staff.” She gives me a sympathetic smile. “I know that finishing this season strong was important to you, but there is a bigger prize that waits beyond graduation.”
I think about Celeste and our future and what it will look like if I go to college. Will I even be okay with that kind of separation? I’m pensive as she steps closer and puts her hand on my shoulder.
“Let me give you some advice from your friendly high school principal,” she says, and it makes the corner of my mouth turn up. “Your decision to go to college doesn’t have to be all or nothing. Going to state isn’t the end of anything.”
I look at her and wonder if she can read my mind.
“Just because you pick up one thing doesn't mean you have to drop another.” She smiles as she squeezes my shoulder. “You’ve got two hands.” With that, she turns and walks away, leaving me standing there in my own thoughts.
The rest of the day moves quickly, and thankfully Celeste and I haven’t missed too much with our assignments being sent home. The rowing team is still calling me captain even though I’m unable to finish out the season. Their support is surprisingly comforting as the freshman twins ask if they still need to keep an eye on Celeste. Knowing that my teammates still have my back makes me feel like I did something right.
“Okay, so Emerson is going to drop me off after we’re finished, and I’ll text you when we’re on the way,” Celeste says after school.
I press my lips together, knowing that I can’t and shouldn’t stop her, but still feeling like I need to protect her. “Okay,” I finally say, trying to force myself to relax.
She goes up on her tiptoes, and I lean down to meet her lips. “I’ll be fine,” she tells me and pats my chest to soothe me.
It works, at least for now. “Have fun,” I say, and I do mean the words. I want her to have fun and be happy. I just need to know she’s safe.
“Don’t worry, I got your girl,” Emerson calls out as he throws his arm over Celeste’s shoulder, and they walk to his Jeep.
For a long minute I contemplate following them and sitting outside the diner until they’re finished. But that wouldn’t make Celeste happy, and that’s always my first priority.
When I look around the parking lot, I see it’s mostly empty except for a few cars. The black sedan a few spaces down is the first one I spot, mostly because I see Shy leaning up against it. We’ve never been friendly, but I wouldn’t say we’re hostile either. He keeps to his side of the school, and I keep to mine. Sometimes I catch him looking at me, and I wonder what it is he sees. There’s something about him that nags at the back of my mind, but instead of trying to figure it out, I keep my distance.
Looks like that’s about to change as he pushes away from his car and walks toward mine. I toss my bag into the passenger side and go around to the driver’s door. Leaning up against it, I wait for Shy to come over and say whatever it is he needs to say.
“How’s Amber?” I spit out, trying and failing to keep the venom out of my voice.
There’s something that passes over Shy’s eyes, and it looks like sadness. Just as quickly as it appears, it’s gone, and he looks at me seriously. “You of all people shouldn’t believe the rumors you hear.”
“Is that what you want to talk about? You’ve come to tell me you weren’t fucking Amber? Good, thanks for the info.”
“Amber has had issues with her mental health for a long time.”
“No shit.” There’s so much anger in my voice it causes Shy to flinch. It’s on the tip of my tongue to apologize, but she tried to kill Celeste, and that is unforgivable.
“You can think whatever the fuck you want to about her, about me, it doesn’t matter.”
“What do you want, Shy?” This conversation is going nowhere.