Dauntless (Gentlemen of the Order 1)

Noah dropped into the seat opposite. “For a woman who believes her character is wholly unattractive, there are at least two men eager to gain entrance to your bedchamber.”

Three if he counted himself.

A flush crept across her cheeks. “Mr Hemming speaks of marriage because he wants to take control of my work. Lord Benham wants me for a mistress, not a wife. Winning the bet is his only motivation.”

Noah didn’t want to control her, nor did he want her for his mistress. So what the hell did he want?

“You ran away from me tonight. You seemed pleased to see me but then fled from the ballroom without so much as a greeting. Why?”

The lady sipped her brandy, gasping as the fiery spirit burned her throat. It was a ploy to distract him while she gathered her wits. Was she keeping another secret? If so, he would walk away, never look back.

“After the debacle with Lord Benham, have we not established that honesty is the only way forward, Miss Dunn?”

“Miss Dunn?” she teased. “I like it when you call me Eva.”

That had been a slip of the tongue, a moment of weakness. “You’re stalling.”

“Am I?”

“What is it you’re not telling me?”

Her light laugh was forced. “I had to use the retiring room.”

“If that’s the truth, why can you not look me in the eye? Why do you squirm in your seat? And your ears are as red as your gown.”

“Must you examine every nuance?” she countered, gazing at the amber liquid sloshing about in the glass. “Why does your need to study mannerisms border on obsessive?”

“Because I was once duped into believing a lie.” The words tumbled carelessly from his mouth. He gave a weary sigh. Aware of the tension he’d held inside for nigh on two decades.

Miss Dunn gave him her full attention. “You were hurt, betrayed by someone you loved.”

Noah’s throat constricted. “Yes.”

His inner torment must surely be evident. But it was wrong to insist she reveal her secrets and demand the right to keep his own.

Miss Dunn’s pretty blue eyes softened. “Then she was a fool to reject you, sir. Your qualities are superior to any man of my acquaintance. A woman would be proud to have you for a husband.”

Though the lady had drawn the wrong conclusion, her faith in him stole his breath. “I—I was not duped by a lover.” No. Were that the case, he might have fallen in love again, been happy. “My mother convinced me all was well hours before she swallowed a fatal dose of laudanum.”

In the crippling silence that followed, Miss Dunn’s breathing grew as ragged as his own. The distress in her eyes mirrored the pain in his heart. Confusion and disbelief hung in the air, as heavy as they had on that dreadful day.

Noah drained his glass, then stood and placed the goblet on the mantel. Staring into the fire’s flames turned his mood reflective. Perhaps he might have prevented the tragedy. Perhaps he could have said something to alter the turn of events.

He felt a gentle hand on his shoulder. The lady placed her glass next to his—hers full, his empty.

“Forgive me,” she whispered. “I would not have pressed you had I known.”

“Now you understand why I despise secrets, Miss Dunn.”

“Please, call me Eva,” she said in the gentle voice that touched him like a deeply moving melody. “Yes. And I understand your need to help women in distress.”

Despite her comment, he could feel the dark cloud of grief descending. The guilt. The frustration. The never-ending questions. “The irony is I can barely remember her, yet that one incident is like a black stain on my conscience.”

He’d never spoken those words to another soul, not even to his grandfather.

“You were a boy. Innocent. Naive to the ways of the world.”

“And yet I blame myself for that, too.”