Matthew sucked in a breath. The sky was clear, and the cool breeze calmed his heated blood. From a moment they stared out over the manicured lawn, each silent and lost in their own thoughts.
Guilt, like a twisted vine, crawled through his body, creeping, crushing, until he could no longer contain the emotion.
Matthew turned to face Priscilla but struggled to look into her eyes. “How can you have any respect for me when I bring these people into our home? Why do you not judge me, condemn my actions, curse me to the devil?”
She gave a weak smile and put her hand on his cheek. “Because I promised to obey you. I promised to stand by your side through life’s trials and tribulations, to trust you. Because you never gave me a choice.”
The last comment hit him hard. The truth was as painful as a knife to the heart.
“I’ve made a mess of things.” There was a part of him that did not want to acknowledge his failures. Ignorance was often bliss. “I’ve undermined the foundation of our relationship, demanding honesty but only when it serves my purpose.”
Her hand slipped from his cheek. “The questions you asked were the ones you thought important.”
That was the point. At no time had he considered her feelings.
“Then I’m asking you to be honest with me now. Truly honest.” Other people’s opinions didn’t matter, yet he knew her criticism would cut deep. “Do not spare me. Do not fear reprisal.”
“Very well.” She swallowed, inhaled and exhaled slowly. “I hate having these people here. A lady should feel safe at home, not worry about a randy lord finding his way into her bedchamber. Just hearing their lustful cries, watching them defile our … well.” A long, drawn-out sigh left her lips. “You’re worth so much more than this. Some things are more important than money.”
For the first time in his life, he had to agree.
“Money was not the only motivation.” He’d hoped people would come to depend on him, to need what he could provide. “Though loath to admit it, these people were like my family.”
“I’m sure you don’t need me to point out the obvious flaws in your logic.”
“No. In truth, you are the only person I can depend upon.” Melancholy infused his tone, and he mentally shook himself. “I should have knocked Boden’s teeth down his throat for what he said.”
“And what good would that do? We need to handle Lord Boden with care until we’ve won back your vowel.”
“There’s a chance we might lose. I’ll not ask my brother for money, and so it would mean raising a loan against this house.”
She shrugged. “If that is what Fate has in store, who are we to argue?”
Priscilla had a way of infusing an element of calm into any situation. When it came to the card game, there was another option though his pride refused to accept it was a possibility.
“We could choose not to play and simply repay the ten thousand I owe.” God, he’d spent weeks dreaming about wiping the smug grin off Boden’s face.
A grim look settled around her mouth. “In all honesty, I’m not certain my uncle has the funds to pay my dowry. No legal documents were ever drawn up. Now I fear his word is not his bond, and you have married me under false pretences.”
Would her uncle be dishonourable enough to renege?
The thought had crossed Matthew’s mind. From what he’d discovered of the lord’s recent antics, Callan was struggling to keep his creditors at bay. The fact Callan owed Boden such a large sum also proved worrying. Perhaps Boden would use the debt to bribe Priscilla.
Matthew shook the thought from his head. It was better to focus on on
e problem at a time than invent scenarios that had not yet happened.
“My reasons for marrying you no longer matter.” Whether he received her dowry or not, one thing was clear. “I don’t care about the money. In time you might not agree, but our foolish, rather rash decision to wed has brought far greater rewards.”
She placed her hand on his chest. “Are you saying you’re happy you have a wife?”
“I’m saying I’m happy I have you in my life.” The sudden urge to show his appreciation took hold, and he brushed her lips in a tender kiss far removed from the lust-fuelled ones they’d shared of late. “I’ll do whatever you suggest. We can play, or we can walk away. I can continue to host these lewd parties, or I can tell them all to go to the devil. As my wife, I’m giving you the choice.”
Without a word, she touched her lips to his and kissed him with the fiery passion he knew burned bold and bright inside. Desire sparked instantly though for them it always simmered below the surface when in each other’s company.
“There is only one way to proceed if we are ever to be truly happy,” she said, breaking contact. “We will play the card game. Neither of us will rest until we stop Lord Boden’s fraudulent activities. My conscience requires that I do something.”
“And if we lose, what then?”