Frustration flared to life inside of me. I hopped up from bench and made a straight line for the door to Savannah’s home. Mason could shrug off the plan as if it meant nothing, but he didn’t know what it meant to me. I’d been following a plan my entire life. It was the thing that had allowed me to get an early acceptance to Northwestern. To make my parents proud. To fulfill every hope they had for me. It was the plan that was going to allow me to finally go to art camp this summer. And most importantly of all, it was that plan that was going to get him through this tough time.
How could he not see that? How could he fight fate?
“Trina, wait!” Mason called.
I ignored him and slid open the back door. People were still dancing on the sofas and the living room floor. A few couples had cozied up in the recliners, while others dotted the dark corners of the house. Savannah danced barefoot on the breakfast bar, a red Solo cup in her hands. She shimmied to the music as the baseball players cheered her on.
I raced past them and pushed through the crowd, searching for my friends. Someone needed to be the voice of reason here. They knew what I’d scraped and planned for my entire life. If I had them as backup, Mason would understand why this couldn’t happen. Why this had been a mistake. He’d realize I was right. He’d know why we couldn’t be together. I pulled out my phone and sent out a group text, hoping desperately that they all had their phones on them.
Trina: This night’s been awful. Have to leave. So sorry, guys.
Within ten seconds, two replies came through.
Mandy: What’s wrong? Where r u?
Audrey: I’m coming. Whatever’s wrong, we’ll fix it with some Casey’s breakfast pizza and chocolate.
Relief washed over me. My friends always had my back. At least I didn’t have to be alone tonight.
“Trina, please. Talk to me.” A hand closed gently around my wrist, pulling me to a halt. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
The sound of Mason’s hurt and stilted voice nearly undid me. This was the opposite of everything that I wanted.
“Project Happiness,” I said, feeling too exhausted to run anymore. I turned to face him, my shoulders drooping. “You’re supposed to be with Polly, remember?”
“Seriously, Trina?” A crazed laugh escaped his lips. He released my wrist and ran both his hands through his hair, leaving it mussed in an incredibly sexy sort of way. I had a hard time even looking at him. My body still buzzed with need.
“You’re meant for each other.” I didn’t mean to sound so broken when I said it. The pain just poured out of me. “You’ll make each other happy.”
His eyes glittered with unsaid emotion as he took a step toward me. “And what about you? Don’t I make you happy?”
I wished in that moment that I could’ve broken out a famous Trina smile and made everything better, but I couldn’t. He was tearing my heart into pieces. Couldn’t he see what this was doing to me? Of course, he made me happy. I loved every single minute I spent with him, whether that was doing homework, welding, or even dinosaur hunting in the mall.
“It doesn’t matter, Mason.” I hugged my torso and looked down at the floor, wishing I had the ability to shrink into a tiny version of myself and run away. “It’s not part of the plan.”
“Screw your project. Screw the plan. Just let it go. Let me be with you.”
I blinked up at him in surprise. There was so much feeling in his voice. Every muscle in his body seemed taut, as if waiting to catch a rebound from my words. His eyes glittered as they searched my face. It felt like the volume in the room was getting higher and the oxygen had turned off. My lungs burned, begging for air.
“I can’t. I won’t.” I scrunched my face to keep from crying.
Pain wracked his face. He leaned down slightly, his teeth bared. “Is it because of the stuff you found out at the hospital today? Is that why you don’t want to be with me?”
My jaw dropped open. Of course that wasn’t it. How could he even say such a thing?
“Trina Frye!”
I closed my eyes against the sound of my name. Savannah was yelling it across the room as if the house were on fire and she needed to warn me.
“Trina Frye, I have to talk to you!”
Not now. I didn’t need to be reminded about the sculpture right now. Not with Mason looking at me like that, like I’d plucked his heart from his chest and stomped on it.
“What happened in the hospital has nothing to do with it,” I said, grabbing his arm as the decibel of my voice went up. He needed to know the truth, if only to wipe that hurt expression off his face. “I don’t care if you have cancer, Mason. You’ll fight through it. I just know it. But it’s not me that you need right now.”
It occurred to me just a few seconds too late that the music in the room had suddenly stopped. I spun to see Savannah standing in front of the sound system, her finger on the power button and her expectant gaze trained on me.
Panic began to seep into my gut. Did I just announce Mason’s illness to the world? What had I done?