I did not have to guess to know something made him that way. That there was something I did not know. And that I wanted to know. I told myself to stop getting ahead of myself.
“Because of your eyes. They’re so big and bright. It’s cute.” I was flattered, honestly.
“I’m not cute.” I teased him.
He stepped closer to me, closing any space there was.
“You are. You’re also very beautiful,” he tucked some hair behind my ear—it was such a sweet gesture. “And I love your body. Want to see more of it sometime.”
His eyes trailed down my front to prove a point. I did not question him meaning what he said. I felt it. The intensity of his eyes was genuine.
“Thank you.” I replied.
His brow arched, “don’t you want to see mine?” He teased.
I knew I had to say something, but I did not want to because I knew I had to be honest too. I always have to be upfront, that’s why men never stick around past the first date when I won’t sleep with them? So why did I have sex with Tristan that night? Who knows. All I know is I have to be honest. It’s why I haven’t had sex in months before that night, but maybe why my heart hasn’t been broken since the tenth grade.
“I do but…I don’t do the whole casual sex thing, I—I’m just not built for it.” His gaze did not falter from mine. In fact, it grew more intense.
“Unfortunately, that’s all I’m about right now.” I furrowed my brow.
“Why?” My heart sunk a little. But it was like I wasn’t ready to just give up on him. Or let him go. You don’t even have him.
“Just is.” His expression was dark, his brows hooded.
“Someone hurt you.” I stated. He did not say anything. But he did not move either, his grip on my waist tightened. He wants me. But how much?
“I won’t pry.” I added. He nodded as if to say thank you.
But all I want to do was pry.
Chapter Nineteen: Tristan
I could feel it in my spine. How much my body wanted her. That wasn’t even a question.
The real one is if I could give her anything else, want anything else. She looked at me like she wanted me, those big blue circles holding the sea bore right through me and make me question everything. If I could trust her. Something told me I could, and it was stronger than with Vivian. The thought of her made me shudder.
I heard something in her voice, a curiosity and care that I usually don’t get from anyone but my family. But I respected her for not wanting to give only half of her. Most women…never mind.
I went dark for a moment, of course someone had hurt me. Bad. I wasn’t sure if I could ever open up again. I had to distract myself with the purpose of this chance meeting. Gabrielle would be pissed if I did not get this right. She is so hard to please, I wonder how Levi survived.
“Let me buy you some lunch. Then we can talk.” I did not phrase it as a question.
She exhausted me and built up my appetite, I was sure she was hungry too. Besides, I wanted to see if I could do something with her that did not involve knocking genitals. I wouldn’t deny it and say I did not want to get to know her more. Maybe we could friends, I just don’t know if I could open up my heart again.
“Okay.”
She nodded.
I took her to the café just down the street, it was walking distance. It felt familiar, walking with my hand on her waist and her tucked into my side. She was soft, she belonged there. What?
I chose a secluded table and we ordered quickly. She went to the bathroom as soon as we got there, then came back, sipping on her tea like she was teasing me. I had imagined those perfect lips around my cock too many times.
“I really thought I would never see you again.” She finally said.
The table was small, our knees brushed as I leaned forward.
“Me too…you thought of me?” I smiled at the question. She had no idea.