SEAL'd With A Kiss
Page 80
His laughter quickly stopped and his brow lowered. For a brief instant, I almost felt guilty for hurting his feelings. But then I remembered how much he had hurt my feelings in leaving the hospital without telling me, as if the time we’d spent together meant absolutely nothing to him. And to add insult to the injury, he was here now, attempting to make light of the situation, thinking that he could just give me a rose and all would be forgiven.
“Is it wrong that I just wanted to see you?” he said. “I’m half delirious and desperately need to get some sleep, but I had to see you first.”
“Well, you see me now. I’m still alive and well. So you can go now.”
Evan sighed. “Tessa—did something happen?”
“You tell me.”
He raised his eyebrows, confused. “Are you angry with me? Did…did I do something? I thought the other night was incredible, but I’m getting the impression you don’t want to repeat it.”
I pursed my lips into a tight line, knowing that if I didn’t take a moment before responding, the onslaught of words leaving my mouth would be far from ladylike. Hell yes I wanted to repeat the other night, let him screw me senseless again. But not before he told me the truth.
“Wow,” Evan said, running a hand through his hair again and then returning his hands to his pockets. “I thought…I didn’t know…Look, Tessa, if you’re done with me, you could have just told me.”
I leaned my head back, an exasperated laugh leaving my throat. “Unbelievable,” I said, shaking my head.
Evan’s expression suddenly turned angry for the first time. “Yeah, I agree. Unbelievable. I sure as Hell should be sorry I thought you wanted to be with me. Damn. You’re just like all the others. I’m sorry. I’ll be going now. You and Lucy enjoy your run. I won’t bother you ladies again. Ever.”
He abruptly turned around and headed back for the door. I watched his retreating form, a sneer that I couldn’t control spreading over my face.
What an asshole…
“You got a lot of nerve, you know that?!” I yelled. Startled, Lucy’s tail stopped wagging and she backed into a corner, watching vigilantly.
Evan stopped and turned around. “How are you turning this on me?” he said. “I came over here just so see you again—”
“For what?! To see me for one last time and have some wild ‘wham, bam, thank you, ma’am’ sex? What do you even care for? You sure didn’t care to tell me you were re-enlisting!”
“What?” Evan said.
“Oh, don’t play dumb with me! I already heard from the nurses on staff yesterday. I guess you already said goodbye to whoever is important enough in your life. I’m just an afterthought, right?”
Evan closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Who told you that?”
“Why?”
“Because I want to know who around that damned hospital is spreading rumors.”
“No one is spreading rumors. It’s just you, hiding secrets. That’s why you returned to the night-shift, right? So that you wouldn’t even have to run into me anymore to give me an explanation. You were trying to make a clean getaway.”
“Tessa, would you listen to yourself? If I was trying to make a clean getaway, why would I be over here right now?”
“I don’t know. To make sure I don’t spiral out of control like some unstable, clingy, lovesick tramp. That’s what you think of me, isn’t it?”
“No! And if you would be quiet for a minute, I could explain.”
I crossed my arms again and narrowed my eyes at him. “Go for it. I’m all ears, Dr. Sholly.”
Evan sighed again and stepped forward. He reached out to me, but I recoiled. He lowered his hand. “Whatever you’ve been told isn’t true,” he said. “I’m not re-enlisting. I don’t know where that rumor even started. All I’ve done is return to the night shift. Every day since Sarah was taken away, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her. I haven’t been able to stop reliving my own childhood and all the terrors that went along with it. It drives me half crazy, the thought of that little girl going through anything remotely similar to what I had to endure. I pray every day that she gets sent to a good family. That’s why I returned to the night shift. I wasn’t trying to avoid you. I just can’t handle seeing hurt kids. I can’t go through anything like that again.”
I shook my head. “So…you’re not going back into the military? You’re just going back to the night shift?”
“Yes,” Evan said. “And you know what? Strangely enough, working the night shift doesn’t even feel right anymore. Do you know why? Because you aren’t there. I missed seeing you so much, and it’s only been a day. That’s why I’m here now. If I start working the night shift again, I’m not going to make it if I still can’t see you. And the only way to do that is outside of work. I was hoping you didn’t mind, especially because we get to dodge that stupid policy too. But it looks to me like none of that matters now, fuck Tessa, why don’t you want to try?”
“I do.” I looked down to the floor, embarrassed. “I feel like an idiot. I was just mad because I though you re-enlisted in the military without telling me. I was afraid of not seeing you again. I thought that you didn’t care about me like I care about you. I…I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions. I don’t even know what to say for myself right now.”
He leaned and kissed me, replacing my anger with passion.